Words Written By Me

Wow… What an incredible week its been.

First off I discover I’m one of 10 finalist for the Savoo “Smartest Shopper Competition” then I go on to be interviewed by four great judges in London.

The competition has a great prize attached. The prize money is generous but you are also given the opportunity to write a “Money Saving Blog” with support from Savoo.

Did I feel incredibly shocked yet incredibly excited about getting this far in the competition? God, Yes…

No matter how far I get in any sort of writing related awards or competitions I still always find that need to pinch myself and pinch myself hard.

Why? Well, there are a few reasons for this but there is one that stands out particularly!

I could say that blogging has opened many doors for me, given me something to tell the grand children (in the FAR away future) but I won’t… Instead I will say how Writing has opened such doors for me instead.

Yes, without the blog how could I do the things I’m doing? But its what goes on the blog that should be noted, after all… What’s a blog without its content.

I wrote a post a while back that spoke about my writing and the reasons why I’d never imagined myself doing what I’m doing today. You see, writing was never my thing (just read this), if anything expressing myself through written content was something I struggled with and therefore disliked immensely! I remember my English teacher telling my mother how I had this amazingly creative mind that I was just wasting by not using it to reach my full potential! Once she started that if I could just put down on paper that creative vocabulary of mine, then we could sell books. I knew even at 12 that this was sarcasm. I’d been a bit of a diva and spoken back to the teacher who was simply not impressed with what I had to say (I had detention for weeks to follow). However, she was always impressed by whatever writing I’d reluctantly produce and she did think that by continuing to write I’d open up a whole new inner passion that I never knew I had.

“Blah blah blah…” I’d think to myself as I impatiently tapped my finger nails on the desk while yawning in an exaggerated manner. Teachers were never right, not by this girls knowledge anyway! I actually remember being sat thinking “Oh stop banging on about it miss… Its Not gonna happen!”

I often sit wondering what she would say if she see me now?

I’m not claiming I’m the best writer! I never read the stuff I’ve written and think to myself wow girl… You sound amazing, go write for a living!… Though I did actually make myself cry once when reading a post id written some months after I’d first published it! My point being, I’m always immensely humbled when I receive an email from a reader complimenting my writing style. I am used to getting emails from readers claiming that I’m an inspiration for sharing my life as a parent to a child with Aspergers and sen. I’d also get those thanking me when I would help them access educational services or advise them on the education laws surrounding their child’s special educational needs. And although i’m just about getting to grips with such words, its those emails and comments that claim my writing to be anything other than bog standard that leave me shocked yet amazed.

If you had asked me as a small primary child or even a raging mad hormone infused teen, if I’d ever see myself writing in the future, and more to the point… actually enjoying it , you can be bet your house on it that I’d quickly respond with with a swift “NO” followed by a burst of giggles (the type that implies you must be insane to even ask).

What I’ve leant is… Miss Whitehead, you were right! Yes, I love to write, I do express my feelings so much better on paper, and if I could chose to do anything during my “Me Time” I’d do exactly what I’m doing now… I’d write!

Did I want to grow up and find myself writing a blog? No!

Did I ever think I’d see any of my writing published in print? No!

Did I ever dream I’d be nominated for any type of blogging awards? No!

Did I ever once think Id go on to collect a Mad blog award (inspirational) in the name of my blog “A boy with Aspergers” for not one but two consecutive years? Whatever… This one is followed by that Swift burst of giggles that again imply your craziness.

Did I ever imagine that people would read about my little self and that blog of mine in the papers? Ha-Ha-Ha… Joker!

I’ve learnt that by combining my passions with words and sharing them through written material in whatever format I choose, I’m able to gain something back that is incredibly rewarding! That something is the knowledge that by doing something I love I’m providing others with something they relate too, laugh at, learn from, take inspiration from or simply just enjoy!

That is something wonderful… And Its something I’m not planning on stopping… Not for a very long time.

So, whether I’m blogging about the ups and downs of parenting a child on the autism spectrum, what I’m wearing, how to make your own face mask, sharing tips on how to get the most out of eBay or simply where to get the best shoes for the littlest price, it doesn’t matter… Why?

Because each would mean nothing without the passion I hold for the things I believe in, the things I enjoy and finally the desire to translate them into words, words written by me.

Every time something amazing comes from something I’ve typed on my Mac… I go through these same motions!

Its these motions that have inspired me to blog today… Who knows what tomorrow may bring.

Aspergers and how it really affects us as a family

Some people comment “It must be so difficult for you as a parent” My answer is always the same… “We’ll, I don’t really know any different”

You see, your born with Aspergers Syndrome and given little man is my first child it means I’ve been parenting a child on the autism spectrum for some 12 years now. It’s not like he suddenly got it and as a result everything had to change! You adjust from child free young women to mum and you adjust in the way that works for you and your child regardless of any condition or disability.

Ok, that doesn’t mean we don’t have difficult days… God only knows we do! But we have good days too.

The thing is, little man isn’t sick, his not got a disease but a condition. His a child that is very able he just struggles within certain areas of life but is able to learn skills to make these areas more comfortable.

There are some very difficult challenges that come from parenting my little man, the lack of sleep is most probably one of the hardest. But then so is watching him become extremely anxious and upset and being powerless to fix it.

I’ve mentioned before that for us the “label” isn’t an issue. It’s my opinion that many families need to acquire a formal diagnosis to open doors to services (that even then you have to battle to obtain them). Autism is a spectrum and although some families don’t feel the need to seek an official diagnosis, many others do.

A younger Little man with a younger Alice just before diagnosis

However, there are some downfalls of that diagnosis and that’s the way others suddenly treat your child. We found ourselves fighting a discrimination case that we brought against Little man’s old primary school as he was forever excluded, bullied, isolated and more. The good thing the label did do, was give us the grounds to bring a case and ultimately win it.

The truth is the official diagnosis helped us get little man the education and treatment programmes he needed! It didn’t change Little man, he was still the same little boy he was the day before diagnosis… Yes he had Aspergers he just didn’t have Aspergers on paper!

Little man with baby brother Harley now 2

In all honestly, life is much harder when your child has Aspergers but mainly because the system… It’s the system that needs fixing not the child.

Early intervention is extremely important as we all know. Nonetheless 18m to 2-year waiting lists to even see a child paediatrician is just diabolical! It’s in this space of time your child starts experiencing certain difficulties but has no access to the appropriate services! By the time he has the diagnosis the difficulties are now boarding on extreme yet your waiting another 18 months for an assessment for recommended treatment of appropriate programmes.

Little man’s siblings do often find things difficult especially Alice-Sara who has often experienced violence at the hands of her brother and his unpredictable behaviour. Yet, she has always been a sister to a brother with Aspergers and although this doesn’t make things different its still all she knows.

Another sibling war

We get on with things… We are presented with problems such as that above we tackle them and we keep on tacking them in till improvements are made. Sometimes these are made quicker than others.

I’d be lying If I said little man’s Aspergers didn’t affect us as a family… Of course it does! But life isn’t unbearable, it isn’t a total display of darkness. Days spent full of meltdowns and distress. Sometimes Aspergers doesn’t come into it! Not everything he does is down to an Aspergers trait, sometimes his just having an almost teenage moment and although behaviour can seem challenging its just that of being a child growing up and having a moment of hot headedness.

Aspergers is apart of little man but it doesn’t define every aspect of his personality and even when it does it doesn’t have to be in that of a bad way.

Aspergers makes little man more goal orientated and rule bound which can be an extremely beneficial trait for a young boy. He is passionate and honest (most of the time) and very intelligent in many areas.

Parenting little man has also made me change as a person. It’s introduced me to a whole new way of thinking. It’s given me drive and passion, opening my eyes to what it is I’m good at and what I want to do with my life.

It’s brought me here to this very blog, its got me writing, sharing something that’s important!

We’re happy and although somedays we may seem as though we are not! We are… We are happy!

A Back To School Special

Oh my goodness can you believe how quickly the holidays passes by. I just cannot believe that they’re going back to school already.

Ok, admittedly there have been certain days, weeks even, when I could be heard asking “When do they go back to school already” But on the whole, the holidays have been relatively good (and thats regardless of them good old meltdowns)!

Yes, I’m pretty nervous about little man’s return to school! Although he went up to the secondary school a few weeks before the breakup, as to allow him some time to get used to the change, I’m guessing there will still be problems. Now, I’m not a pessimist, just a realist, a mother who’s now been parenting a boy with Aspergers for almost 12 years!

These last few weeks of the holidays I’ve been doing certain things to prepare little man.

I’ve got him to wear his new shoes on a daily basis as to wear them in.Then there’s his new uniform that I’ve had him sit around in for 15 minutes each day.This is all in the hope that it helps him to avoid any sensory related difficulties or induced meltdown, on the day that he starts.

My daughter has her uniform all hung up ready for her return to school on Thursday. I admit to getting this really last minute (Saturday, that’s how last minute)! Luckily ‘Matalan’ had fresh stock and saved the day. You can catch our review here tomorrow.

As for stationary… This year I’m over organised, taking no chances whatsoever!

Many will know how little man has poor fine motor skills a trait of his Aspergers Syndrome. As a result he stopped writing for a few years of his life. He would only write using a computer and as a mother who still believes in the benefits of good old fashion writing, this upset me!

He completely lost all his confidence when it came to putting pen to paper but since leaving mainstream and starting at his independent special school where his undergoing weekly OT sessions, this is all history now as his writing and enthusiasm to do so, is improving with each passing day.

My daughter Alice-Sara who like myself, loves to write and is also actually very creative, has her own difficulties. However these are more so with her letter formation, and writing style. She is finally just in the process of being tested for Dyslexia. She is left handed like myself and for many years did mirror writing and at times still does. (This is where letters and numbers are written back to front)!

This is why the right stationary is important to us. For many a pen is nothing other than simply that… “A pen” but it’s important for my children to use pens and pencils that they are comfortable using.

This year the lovely PR for STABILO offered to help us find some stationary that the children could really benefit from.

Here’s a selection of what we tried.

The Double ended pen is available in sets of 10 and are targeted at children 6 years and above. The pen feature stackable lids to encourage good organisation skills. This double tip pen has a fine tip for writing and sketching and a broad tip for colouring in. What’s more each end has an ergonomic triangular grip zone which helps the child to hold the pen correctly. Perfect for little man a child with poor fine motor skills.

Other great features to the STABILO Trio double ended pen is its washable ink! A must have feature unless you enjoy trying to remove ink from white school shirts? Mmmm… I thought not!

This is a great pen for both my children and Alice-Sara loves how this allows her to switch quickly between writing and colouring. Little man liked it’s fine tip, the fact he could write in colour. He especially liked how it felt against the paper, commenting that it writes really nicely.

The Cappi Pen is targeted at children aged 6 years and above. I love these pens as the caps can be easily threaded onto a cap ring making them less likely to lose (that’s unless they lose the entire cap ring with all the lids attached or worse the pens them self). Again these are great for both my children as both have issues with organisation skills and are forever misplacing things.

Like before the STABILO Cappi pen features that all important ergonomic grip zone that allows children to hold their pen correctly, giving them a better grip and prevents little fingers from slipping. Another feature is its unusual tube shape that has been designed so the pen doesn`t roll away and can be easily picked-up. Oh and if you do happen to misplace your cap ring when using a pen then don’t panic you have plenty of time to look for it as these won’t dry out for at least 24 hours.

Alice-Sara, my fellow lefty was lucky to get her hands on the STABILO EASYOriginal pen. I say lucky as this has been a godsend and I can’t see her using anything else again.The pen is targeted at children learning to write as well as school age children over 6 years. There are two kinds of EasyOriginal available! Those designed for left handed children as well as one designed for the right handed child.

Features… A new interpretation of the fountain pen but instead an ergonomically designed rollerball. This is the first rollerball especially designed for left- and right-handers.

The pen has a specially formulated grip zone made from non-slip material which gives children far better control over the pen.

I loved the easy no mess solution it provided when it comes to refilling your pen. Every refill has a new tip which means that children are not exposed to the ink itself avoiding spillages.

Alice-Sara loves the pen and we are going to seek permission for her to be able to take and use the pen at school. She’s currently at Primary school and as standard they can usually be found writing in pencil (unless given pen licenses which means obtaining a standard handwriting pen)! I can’t see why it should be a problem what with the been being praised by teachers, approved by parents and loved by children.

I’ve since brought a right handed STABILO EASYOriginal pen for Little Man as STABILO report how children using an EASYOriginal pen, are given a more relaxed hold whilst writing! This in itself prevents muscle fatigue which is great news for my son.

I’ve even tried my daughters left hand pen and can comment on its ease of use, comfortable handling resulting in my improved neat and tidy handwriting (even when rushing) For me the fact that it doesn’t blot or scratch is a real bonus!

Available with royal-blue erasable ink, document-proof black ink or red ink.
All colour combinations feature a space for a name tag.

The STABILO Trio Scribbi is targeted at artist who want to get to grips with a pen for the first time, as well as children who have difficulties with using pens because of motor skills (like Little man). So… Why is it different? Well, this is a pen that is said to be almost indestructible thanks to its push-resistant thick tip. Its clever triangular design helps children get a secure ergonomic grip. Its great for kids like Little man who tends to get more pen on his hands than on that of the paper as its super-washable for problem-free cleaning of hands and even clothes.

Little man used it but states that he still couldn’t colour correctly with it as he still coloured outside the lines of his drawing. I think his looking for a pen with a Miracle solution to the problem.

The STABLIO Woody 3 in one was for Alice-Sara as its a pencil that has been designed for the child who loves to draw. The pencil has a unique feature that acts as a colored pencil, watercolour and wax crayon all in one.
It has XXL break-proof lead ­that is as thick as 8 standard coloured pencils. It’s designed to be highly pigmented with high opacity and colour intensity, even on dark paper! Better still this is a pencil that writes on smooth surfaces such as glass, metal, leather etc.

This is ideal for Alice-Sara as its unique versatility supports her every expanding creative development.

This awesome 3-in-1 comes in translucent colors (red, green, blue).

But it’s not just stationary we needed to think about. I still had the issue of little man’s hygiene. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that he just don’t want to wash, his just extremely tactile defensive. The way his skin feels once its absorbed water Is something he finds hard to tolerate… “You know that squeaky clean feeling or worse the one where your fingers wrinkle?” It’s so hard as this tactile defensiveness affects many areas such as nail cutting and teeth brushing. Every single day morning and night without fail it remains a battle. This means that getting little man to wash his hands before eating or after using the toilet is just plain handwork that I’m losing the energy for.

Little man is at an age where I should no longer need to follow him around demanding he does these basic acts of hygiene.Then there is the issue of school! I don’t want staff to have to constantly ask him to wash his hands. As a solution I’d just have him keep a small tube of hand cream (though he still found it hard to overcome the anxiety about the initial task). We also tried hand sanitiser, only these created there own problems. Not only did some bring around the exact same problem as before but the smell would make him feel ill. One or two even caused him reactions due to there harsh ingredients.

We were sent a bottle of my pocket buddy on-the-go hand sanitiser to review. Our problem was detected in a tweet and the lovely social media team behind the brand, got in contact and as a result, shipped one of these to the little man pretty quickly.

Here’s what this pocket buddy claims to do…

“My Pocket Buddy® on-the-go hand sanitiser has been scientifically formulated to kill 99.99% of germs, whilst still being kind to your hands. Our product range includes an 8ml pen spray for children, a 50ml foamer for adults, and a 500ml foaming dispenser, ideal for the home, nursery, or your place of work.

Not only is My Pocket Buddy® alcohol free and made from 100% natural ingredients, it’s effective in seconds, helping reduce germs, bacteria, viruses and fungi on the skin. There are no chemical nasties in any of our products, ensuring safe protection for your hands, and giving you peace of mind that your loved ones are protected too.”

For us the thin pen design is the perfect size for little man to carry around yet big enough for him to find in his pocket without getting stressed (the little man hates losing things and having to look for them)! The fact that it’s also a spray makes it so quick and easy to use.

Most importantly and I say this with a huge smile on my face… He likes it, there is a massive reduction in the uncomfortableness he would normally feel when using water or another alcohol based sanitiser. What’s more it doesn’t smell as potent and his therefore coping well with using it.

The only issue we are left with now is ensuring we have enough and don’t run out as his built up a routine and as Little man will tell you… “Routines were not designed to be broken!”

Those who have similar problems can find out more by visiting the product page online

This is not a sponsored post and no payment has been made by those brands mentioned. I didn’t have to write and review any of the products discussed within this post, as I was not asked to included them here. All words are my own and not influenced from anyone other than myself.

My daughter will be assessed for Dyslexia

Today I had a meeting at my daughters school, I went in thinking I was going to be thrown a load of excuses as to why I wasn’t informed my daughter was on the special educational needs register, but actually things went a little more differently.

You see, all those who have lied to me are no longer employed at the school. The head master whom I had a terrible relationship with due to the discrimination my son received and the SENCO who has lied about both my children’s needs, have left. The new head teacher has been brought in to repair all the damage that has been done and therefore get the school back on track.

I was almost left open mouthed when I realised I wasn’t being feed anymore bull shit. This new head teacher apologised for the fact I wasn’t told stating it was unacceptable. She has looked through my daughters sen file and through some of her work and feels that she should have been assessed for dyslexia!

She has told me she wants to sort this ASAP as to give my daughter the best chance in year 5. Extra help will be provided to enable her to catch up with her reading and writing. We also discussed the possibility of maybe booking her in with an optician to see If coloured lenses could help her read better (it currently takes her a long time to read a book).

I have appointments booked with her class teacher on Monday and the head teacher is writing a letter explaining my daughters SEN, the reasons she is on the register and the help they have been providing her with.

I have put a lot of trust in this school before and been let down badly. However with the new senior staff in place, a temporary SENCO and no sign of anyone who damaged us in the past, I feel that just maybe communication will be better.

I won’t let my guard down, I can’t afford to. I will continue to over document everything, monitor attendance (maybe asking for a weekly breakdown of her attendance for my records) as well as making sure the AWO stays on top of things.

I really want to believe the new head teacher is one that I can fully trust. I have got to a stage where I feel I can not trust anyone and hope that my confidence in the system can slowly be repaired. Surly not all head teachers are bad… Right?

To have someone agree with me that records have not been kept as they should have and as a result I could have actually gone to prison, is a start!

To have an apology is also a step forward.

I don’t know why both the SENCO and Head teacher left suddenly but I am pleased to see the back of them!

I just want my children to go off to school in the mornings and come home smiling. I want a good healthy school home relationship… Just like the one I have with my sons independent special school… Surly it’s not to much to ask, is it?

Writing a book on parenting a child with Aspergers

Yes, it’s official, the girl who declared in school that she would never acquire an interest or desire to write, has actually gone ahead and started writing her very own book!

It’s been on the agenda for sometime now and when asked the question of “Could you see yourself writing a book on parenting a child with Aspergers which has been inspired by your blog” during a press interview with the local paper as a result of winning a Mad blog award last September, I suddenly found myself saying “Yer, why the hell not”

Now, I don’t want to give to much away on here, after all I don’t want anyone running away with my story, but I will say its going to be me wearing my heart on my sleeve and telling it how it is.

It won’t be a “How To Book” and I hope it won’t be regarded as just another “Parenting a child with Aspergers book” my aim isn’t to make it a long winded story involving the ins and outs of symptoms and triggers, but more the affects ignorance can have and how it’s not only the child’s mental health that suffers as a result.

Having attended the brilliant Britmums Live parent bloggers confrence over the weekend (post on that to follow) I was able to obtain some tips and advice in the “The Path To Getting Published With Bloggers That Have Done It” workshop (which was most inspirational).

Yes, I had already started writing prior to the workshop so therefore had already obtain ideas on the style of writing I wanted for my book, the market I was aiming it at attracting and so forth, as for getting it published and how to go about doing so I had no idea!

In such a short space of time the speakers filled my brain with need to know info and It left me that bit more informed when it comes to the “Dos and Don’ts” when trying to get published.

As a result of this fabulous workshop I’ve since had plenty to occupy my mind! Yes, there’s the question of do I and should I be trying to get myself an agent? And if so where to start? I’ve also thought more about how I should approach publishers and agents to gain interest in my book and how this is done in a somewhat different way than that of the “Fiction book” There’s the important factor that actually I don’t have to have written my entire book to do so, a letter with my book proposal and showing how marketable I am is actually a more important factor at this stage! The fact that I have a good online presence is apparently a very good start and that of my blog is a massive added bonus. So basically showing I already have readership and I’m good at promoting myself, my blog and that of my interest, through social media (yes, twitter followers, Facebook page likes and blog subscribers) actually means I’m in a good position to go for it and start making it happen!

To think my writing could go beyond the reach of my blog is one exciting but also slightly nerve-wracking feeling!

If my story makes it onto paper which is encased within a front and back cover I’d have archived so much more than I first set out to! So much so, that thinking about it makes my tummy flip! Yer, what do you make of that misses disapproving head shaking English teacher?

My writing journey has been something of an incredible one. My first post almost 4 years ago, was my way of expressing the emotions I was experiencing during them very hard days pre-diagnosis. It was a release, despite it being there for the world to read it was for me! A way to let go of anger, unload my head and get through another day. Over time this changed, although the above reasons remained it also became my way of communicating with those who related to my story. I gained advice and as time passed by I began to realise that I had been providing comfort to others.

My writing helped me grow stronger, it helped me through hard times and importantly, it helped me find my voice. I wanted to help others, mainly I wanted to raise awareness for Autism and Aspergers (the later being the diagnosis my son had by now obtain).

The Internet is a powerful tool, but more powerful is that of ones voice, though not actually heard but read. My writing allows me to express myself much more than I would think possible if I was speaking out loud. My writing comes from my heart and I hope that will come through in my book.

So, there you have it! I’ve been inspired to get out there and make this really happen. Now I’ve just got to reach out and this post will be a start. So with that if anybody can help me, point me in the write direction, offer any tips, advice and so forth then I’m all ears!

Any agents out there… Well… HELLO do step forward, come on… Don’t be shy!

#HAWMC Day 29 – The six sentence blog post

Firstly I should state that the #HAWMC (Health Activist Writers Month Challenge) is well and truly over. Although I wrote my last two post at the end of April this is however the first real opportunity to post them.

Post 29/30: A six sentence blog post

Life can be difficult & tiresome, yet rewarding in many ways.

Using the power deep within, we somehow convert the difficulties into positives and with that we grow stronger.

When it comes to our children we’re fight you to the core.

We will climb up any Mountain, swim any Ocean.

We would go to the ends of the earth and back if we had to.

Because we love them and nothing will ever change that.

Post 29/30 in the #HAWMC set by Wego health

A Mad Video Plea

Guess what? There really isn’t very long left till nominations close for the Mad blog awards 2012.

As many will already know, I was lucky to be nominated in two categories last year (blogger of the year & Most inspirational) and I was delighted to go on to win the title “Most Inspiring Mad blogger” 2011 back in September. 

Of course I’d love to be part of the Mad blog awards this year, not just because it was a lot of fun last year and I got a night off duty when attending a glitzy awards ceremony but it also helped me create lots of publicity for the blog and therefore the subject it’s built around, “Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome” It was truly rewarding being able to create lots of awareness for something I’m so very passionate about. 

I haven’t really done much in the way of drumming up nominations as I know the public can get a bit peed off with the constant “Vote for Me… Vote for Me” scenario!

So, I thought I’d hopefully come at it from another angle and share this video I created with you… After all its much nicer and I feel quite proud of it 🙂

Here’s hoping you’ll enjoy it and feel inspired to pop our blog on the nominations list. 

A boy with Aspergers would love to be nominated for blogger of the year and again most inspiring. It’s dead simple to nominate, just click HERE and enter our URL in the nomination box for blogger of the year (this is the only category you must nominate someone for! All other categories are optional). Click next and pop the URL in the most inspiring box. Only requirement is to include your name and email on the nomination form, though the Mads do not spam you so your safe. It really does take less than a minute to nominate and myself and the little man would really appreciate your support.

Thanks for reading and watching

Love

Claire and the one we refer to as the Little Man! xx 

Related articles

• Hint… Hint – The Mad Blog Awards 2012 (aspergersinfo.wordpress.com)
• Meme – My 2011 Highs and Lows (aspergersinfo.wordpress.com)
• The Sunshine Blog Award (thereadingitch.wordpress.com)

#HAWMC DAY 10 – Dear 16-Year-Old Me

Dear 16-year-old me…

Yes, I know you think it will be easy, move to Spain living the high life with your pals, pals that will actually be long gone by your 17th Birthday! Surprised?

You will be!

Do you think the world owes you little girl? It owes you nothing, in fact you need to brace yourself for the ride of your life, a roller coaster that will leave you clinging, one so fast and furious you’re not know if you’re coming or going!

Life owes us nothing and you’ll soon discover this!

Here’s some valuable advice to start you on your journey.

You’ll face some difficult times, ones that test your inner strength more than you’ll ever know possible.

You’ve already come so far, though metal health will always remain a big part of your life. Stop hiding from it, deal with it, life is far simpler this way.

You’ll continue your battle with OCD but as you grow, you’ll grow stronger and every now and then you’re realise how you’ve grabbed it by the balls.

You’ll become a young mum, but a good one. Your journey through parenthood wont always be an easy one but it will be an awarding one at that.

Your first-born son will be diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome at age 7, you’ll use so much strength obtaining the diagnosis you’ll have little left to digest it!  

Remember, those who are meant to understand probably wont, don’t waste your energy trying to make them… take it one step at a time.

You, have so much to offer, though you don’t know it yet god has a plan, it’s a pretty good one too.

Eating disorders, anxiety and OCD, you’ll thing you’ve faced it all, only life has some surprises, you’ll get through them your strong.

You’ll discover that schools are not what you thought they were when you discover how the child you love is so cruelly discriminated against and at this point you’ll be gearing up for the hardest battle yet.

You’ll learn all there is to learn when it comes to special educational needs, but your determination will see you through it and this determination will then be used in the most powerful of ways.  

You’ll endure the heart breaking pain of losing a pregnancy and never meeting your twins, but you’ll be greeted with the beautiful toddler you have today.

By age 30, you’re the mother of three beautiful children and though life can be hard at times, you know your blessed with the most precious of gifts one could ask for. 

Oh yes, right now you hate to write, actually you loath it! The funny thing is, this will become your love, you’ll write everything, your life becomes an open book, one you hope inspires others… writing is what you now do, you even bag yourself an award for doing it so well.

Yes, little Claire Louise, I see you hold your tummy as you laugh yourself into a frenzy… just you wait and see!

Blog 10/30 in the wego health #HAWMC 

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#HAWMC Day 2 – A NOT SO INSPIRING QUOTE

There is one quote that quite frankly gets on my Nelly … “An apple a day keeps the doctor away”

Why is this even suggested? Who made this stuff up? Come on, seriously, I live in a country where it takes a month to even get a slot with your local GP let a lone a CAMHS Paediatrician (Child Adolescent Mental Health Service) who is there to assist me with any issues or difficulties relating to Little Man, his Aspergers Syndrome, Anxiety and a whole other host of issues! “So… Frankly, who needs some piece of fruit?”

Yes, maybe I shouldn’t take such old wife tales so personally, actually I don’t! I’m pretty much able to disguise between what needs to be taken with a pinch of salt and what needs to be absorbed as reality, though this isn’t the case for everyone… this isn’t the case for Little man.

This is a child who mostly sees the world in black & white, without the support given from certain therapies he may just spend his days indulging in an apple a day only to get that sudden bump to earth when he actually requires a doctor to come his way and will they?

The likelihood of actually chocking on one of these healthy daily snacks seems more likely and yes the doctor would still be “Away” just when you ironically need him!

Of course my point isn’t related to apples, well not as such, its about services, much needed services that parents like me and thousands of others physically need to fight for! We deal with the hidden disability, the stigma nestled between child mental health and that of neurological disorders… yet here we are still finding our child stuck on a waiting list, one that’s so long it’s not surprising that when you receive the much awaited letter, your child’s out collecting his P45 and your at Bingo.

So, as I sit and watch the UK slowly slip down the pan, as the coalition destroy just about anything in its path I wonder how we move on from here? I basically want to know why a man who promised a better deal to those with disabilities, their families and registered carers, is now doing what can only be described as his “Best” to kick us to the curb first, in his mission to take over the country acquiring himself one or two well deserved nick names a long the way? Is there a game plan, this is politics after all! Surly he doesn’t think that making yourself into this hugely hated figure within society will get you any brownie points in the long run? Is it plain to see that he didn’t receive my vote?

See, now I’m running of course….

The reason behind such a sudden “Pop” directed at the UK Government is for the same reason most find themselves ticked off! As a member of this society, I sure am sick of hearing promises that quickly find themselves forgotten and buried within some dusty old file in the house of commons! As a mother of a child with Aspergers and Special Educational Needs, who fought for a statement of sen only to fight for that same statement to be amended! A parent who has endured the battle for her child’s right to an educational placement that can meet his needs, I was bitterly disappointed at the proposed “Green Paper” and worse the lack of progress since (well, public progress)! Yes, the LEA and Health Authority will now work together, families will be able to access the services “they can’t access now” till their child becomes 21! Lets not also forget that both LEA support services and those provided by the National Health Service will become readily available, what with the change in the assessment process! Remember this is for the benefit of those with disabilities and their families, nothing to do with government cuts and quick fixes at the expense of the most vulnerable! It will all be perfect wont it! Everything will be so much more efficient & faster this way, you may even get a little respite if your lucky … Blah… Blah… Blah… YES, We’re all still waiting?

So, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away?” Um, NO! Broken promises, shabby money saving cuts, and politics, that my friends is what keeps that doctor away!

This post was written as part of the #HAWMC, 30 prompts, 30 days, 30 post (this was day 2)

Check out the wego health facebook page for more info and a whole load more bloggers talented bloggers  the challenge.

This mum made front page news

Early Tuesday morning I’m awoken by an excited Little man.

Oh, yes he knows what day it is… his been counting the days since Friday.

We walked into our local newsagents a little after 6:30 am. Little man darted over to the newspaper stand knocking over several boxes of unpacked crisp and a shop assistant filling the fridge. He was causing complete chaos at this very early hour!

“Mum, mum look, we are on the front page!”

The little guy was right! There on the front page of the local rag was a picture of myself and the Little man.

In big bold letters the headline read…

… “All about a boy… Blogging mum up for award”

 full story on page 31

The man stood behind the counter gave me a smile and a wink as Little man placed his 50p on the counter. He stood tall and proud in the hope he was recognised!

“That’s a handsome young fella in the paper! Hang on a minute, he looks familiar”
 The shopkeeper joked!

Little man shouted so loud it’s likely he damaged the poor guy’s ear drum when replying, “That’s me with mum… can’t you see?”

“Oh yes… So it is”

Little man was displaying a huge grin, obviously enjoying his five minutes of fame!

The shopkeeper, a lovely elderly gentleman that I’ve known for some years, went on to say in a chirpy tone, “Well, as it’s you on the front cover… the papers on me today!”

Little man stood thinking, overcome with confusion. Completely baffled by the man’s comments he asked, “What do you mean? The newspaper isn’t on you… It’s on the counter!” He was shaking his head as to imply the shopkeeper was a tad stupid for making such a ridicules comment!

Now, let’s not forget that this is a little boy with Aspergers, who has a tendency to take things rather literally! So, I explained just what the shopkeeper had meant to which he politely thanked him for his generosity by stating he was ‘Safe’ (he has a mind like a sponge) before making his swift exit.

Little man had more excitement to come. The article in the ‘South London Press‘ was one of two Newspapers we would be featured in that week.

The Second paper, ‘The Newshopper’ was released the following day. Both papers were running the story about a Lewisham mother of three, who had made it to the finals of the ‘Mad blog awards’, a national blogging competition showcasing some of the best British blogs written by parents. Of course that ‘mother’ was me *smiling gracefully* 

No, I won’t deny it! When I was sent the press release to edit and forward as I pleased, I didn’t expect much to come of it!

This blog is simply a documentation of our life alongside my own thoughts and opinions. As crazy as our life may seem to others, it’s a life that many parents of a child with autism will possibly  relate too as the norm

You just don’t expect your blog to end up in the newspapers! Then again, you don’t expect to your blog to be in the running for a national award (especially in two categories)

I will often write a post and once complete I read it back and think to myself, “Seriously who wants to read this stuff?”

Gosh, I love how this blog has changed me. Its helped me to discover a lot about myself! If you had asked me three or so years back, “Do I enjoy writing?” My reply would have likely been… No! Seriously…  My English teacher would have a heart attack if she read this. Ok my grammar isn’t top notch (sorry miss, I try) Yet I’ve discovered that putting down my feelings for the world to read is somewhat therapeutic! I’m expressing myself in a whole new way… And enjoying it!  Ask me now if I love to write and my answer would be a whole lot different. Now that is something I never saw coming… Ever!

I’ve written this blog while in an array of psychological mind sets. There’s been tears (to many), laughter, sadness, anger, joy, exhaustion and excitement!
Since becoming a finalist I’ve been lucky enough to encounter some awesome opportunities… Did I mention that I’m currently writing a piece for this months SEN magazine? *cheeky giggle*

With every congratulations whether it’s from the press, a friend, family member or fellow parent to a child with autism, I feel a great sense of achievement that this mum who is no means a super mum, has managed to get her voice heard when raising an issue that is not only close to her heart, but one that is also enormously important!

This is more then a blog award competition (don’t get me wrong, winning would be oh-so-fabulous & your votes are most welcome) What I’m trying to empathise is that although autism and aspergers has come a long way with the help of the media, there is still so much to say! All over the world children are being failed through not having their educational needs met, where adults are left unemployed… regardless of their skills.

I thank the ‘Mad blog awards’ for bringing about a powerful way to get heard while having a great amount of fun in the process! As for you guys… Thank you for getting me here by nominating the blog… All you need to do now is vote (cheeky)!!

To vote the blog, ‘A boy with Asperger’s’ as your most inspiring/inspirational mad blog 2011, visit the Mad voting page: Here

The article in the, ‘South London Press’ can be found: Here

The, ‘Newshopper’s’ article can be found: Here