Wear It For Autism: Nominations Now Open

Has your life been affected by autism or do you know someone whose has? Do you know someone who is always putting others before themselves and deserves an extra-special treat? Nominate them now and they could be part of Wear It For Autism.

Wear It For Autism is looking for mums, dads, children and carers – who either have autism themselves or care for those living with the condition – to have a full makeover and take centre-stage in a stylish fashion event at London’s Vinyl Factory on Tuesday 10 September.

Nominations are open now until Sunday 23 June 2013. Celebrity judges, including Gail Porter and Adele Silva, alongside Maggie Paterson, Principal of Pineapple Performing Arts Covent Garden, will select winners from across five categories – mums, dads, young carers, children with autism, and adults with austim. All the winners will be treated to a top-to-toe makeover by styling experts and take part in the Wear It for Autism catwalk show.

Anna Kennedy said: “The idea behind Wear It For Autism was to spoil those who usually never get a chance to treat – or even think of – themselves. Living with autism can be challenging and extremely demanding, so we wanted to create a special event that will be fun for all involved, as well as raise vital funds to campaign for the rights of those with this disability.”

If you know a parent, carer or child affected by autism, or if you want to take part in Wear It For Autism, nominate now at www.annakennedyonline.com

Tickets for the show are available now, priced £25 each. All profits go to the registered charity Anna Kennedy Online, which supports UK families affected by autism, including providing small grants for educational and domestic resources

Sponsor’s for the event are, Littlewood’s,Toni & Guy, Pineapple Arts, London Beauty Queen and Mahogony

Here Comes The Sun – Tips To Help The Sensitive Child Cope

As the days and nights become increasingly warmer your sensitive child on the autism spectrum may require a little help in coping with the sensory issues that summer may bring.

So here’s a few tips aimed at those parents of the sensitive child! After all everyone deserves to have a great summer don’t they!

1) Does your child show a dislike to most sun protection products? Little man doesn’t enjoy the application of sunscreen and will spend half the day refusing to comply with my request to apply it. The dislike of sunscreen by a child on the spectrum could be due to a number of factors all of which are a result of the child’s senses. Little man hates the feeling of the lotion on the skin (protests that all feel sticky). This is as well as the smell of the lotion and the fact he needs help with the application process. Here’s some suggestions…
A – Try a powder protection like the one from bare essentials its odourless too.
B – Let your child learn to apply the sun lotion themselves using a mirror then try to cover hard to reach areas that will be exposed to the sun with clothing (thin and cool material)
C – Experiment with different brands of sun protection. Many have different smells and textures and most brands offer sample size bottles or sachets.

2) Try to organise outdoor activities around the midday sun. Children with autism who are sensitive to the suns rays will thank you for it.

3) Use a good insect repellent! No one likes getting bitten by insects and its a 1000 times worse for the child who is tactile defensive. Clothing that comes into contact with the skin is already an issue for these children but if clothing rubs causing friction to an insect bite things become intensely over sensitive. Then there’s the issue of infection to bite. Little man doesn’t listen if I tell him not to scratch a bite, he really can’t control the need to do so, having no power to resist. Your best bet is to just be safe and avoid insect bites altogether. As before experiment in till you find the right product for your child. Another good tip is to use fly nets at the windows or an air conditioning unit at night.

4) Cover up with a hat! As you should for all children insist your child on the spectrum wears some form of sun hat. Your child will be more comfortable in the sun and this will reduce the risk of sunstroke and little mans most feared pain… The headache! If your sensitive child refuses to wear a hat then try alternatives such as a sun umbrella and whenever possible, staying indoors during the hottest point of the day (the midday sun).

5) Does your child with Autism have a fear of flying insects? It isn’t a trait as such, but not uncommon for children with autism to have such a fear. Sometimes its due to factors such as the noise these insects make… Noises such a buzzing from bees, flys and wasps. It can also be down to a fear of getting bitten or stung due to it happening perhaps one day in the past. Regardless of the reason, its usually an intense fear, one that children on the autism spectrum will struggle to deal with. Its all too easy to hide away from those things we are scared of! However this only makes things more difficult in the long run as one day them fearful critters will sneak up on us. My tip… That its better to deal with fear head on by facing it! This can be made much harder when the child who is scared of such insects has a type of autism. But it can be done! It normally just takes a little longer. Ideas…
A) Let children learn more about the things they are frighten about. Use the Internet with them to unravel exciting facts.
B) During warm months use Mosquito nets at windows.
C) Be persistent when helping your child face their fears. Keep on trying on a daily basis.
D) If extreme (to the point your child wont leave the house) then speak to child practitioner for information, advice and ideas.

6) Use a thin 100% cotton sheet instead of a duvet at night! If your child is already a poor sleeper the heat could potentially make this issue worse. Try offering your child lighter cooler bedding. In the summer months little man will often use a sheet instead of a duvet. As long as its 100% cotton we don’t have any tactile issues.

7) Whether appropriate clothing! I found that during the colder months I have to fight the little man to wear his coat, yet in the summer he refuses to go out without it. Experiment with different coats that are appropriate for the current climate. If your child insists on wearing a coat in summer then give them thin cotton summer jackets. Be sure to make sure the material is suited to your child’s tactile needs (little man will not wear waterproof material)!

8) Head to the beach! Being by the sea is always much cooler with the sea breeze. Little man always seems so much happier when we are spending time at the coast. We try to visit less crowded beaches to keep his stress levels down.

9) Avoid the shops! If like little man you’re child on the autism spectrum hates shopping at the best of times then avoid shopping trips during them hot summers afternoons. This is a recipe for meltdowns… You’ve been warned.

10) Cool down! I’ve found that by giving little man a battery operated hand fan he manages the summer heat much better. We did try using cool mist but spraying this on the little man’s face didn’t go down to well. See what works best for your child but if you do opt for a battery operated fan then be sure batteries are fully charged and maybe keep a spare set in your handbag just in case.

Well that’s about it for now. Hope these small tips help and if you have any of your own, then please share in the comments section. Thanks.x

How Stress Is Making Me Bald At 31

Since having the toddler 3 years ago I’ve been shedding hair faster than a snake sheds its skin. Of course the doctor told me I was only losing the extra hair I’d gained during my pregnancy! He looked at me with a slight smile as I protested that actually my hair had began thinning during my pregnancy! Seriously, there were no luscious locks in need of shedding here! The look on his face said it all… He thought that I was overreacting… My panic, unjustified!

As a child, teenager and young woman in her early twenties, my hair was thick and healthy. During my later twenties and drawing closer to the big 30, my hair was struggling to keep up. Now as I write this, age 31, my hair is so thin you can just see my scalp. I have some noticeable patches to the front area of my head.

Another visit to the doctor almost 3 years following the first and my worse fears are confirmed… My hair is falling out! Why? I’m told its stress!

If I was going to lose eyebrows and lashes then it would have happened already… Well, I guess that’s something positive at least!

I’ve read about this happening to both children and adults, both men and women. Some people lose all their hair in a speedy fashion and sadly experience no regrowth. Others are more fortunate and the hair comes out at a much slower pace and new hair continues to grow, only at a far slower pace (looks thin but not noticeably bald). I kind of fall within the latter, only now I’m losing the hair faster than ever before and I suspect that the regrowth of my hair is much slower!

Annoyingly, I don’t over style my hair, I use heat defence spray when blow drying and despite owning GHDs straighteners I’m careful and don’t use them on a daily basis! Whenever I do straighten my hair I do well to protect it by opting for a good heat protector and intensive conditioning treatment. So… Why do I consider the above to be so annoying? Its simple… I’ve taken steps to avoid damaging my hair only to discover I’m literally forcing it from my scalp with the power of my mind alone. As I sit worrying about certain happenings in my life somehow its my hair (whats left of it) paying the price.

Yes… I’ve felt somewhat stressed, more so these past few months for sure. There are a lot of things happening in life right now, not only I, but my family as a whole have been dealing with a lot stuff of late. Its the type of stuff that makes you sick with worry and no matter what you do its one of those situations that are way beyond your control. Yes, this is stress at its worse, the type fuelled by worrisome thoughts that when combined with other everyday pressures, they become extremely explosive! The end result… A 31 year old women preparing to wig shop!

As some may expect, I went through the motions… Checked the mirror every 20 minutes as so to ensure their was still hair on my head, brushed my thinning hair ever so gently and lastly… I used all the “miracle” hair treatments, the ones promising hair like that of Cheryl Coles.

But no more! I’m now just getting on with things! After all worrying about something that is caused by stress isn’t going to get me anywhere now is it? I’ve decided that I’m going to have fun with what hair is left on my head, starting with colouring it pink… Yes pink! I’m using a less harmful colour treatment and may even throw in a little blue if I’m feeling adventurous. Why? You might ask? Well… Why not?

I’ve come to realise that in life there are much more pressing issues then that of my fading hairline. By adapting this attitude I could also be doing my hair some good. However do I expect to correct an issue caused by stress if I’m stressing even more as a result?

Its all about the inner issues and its them that I’m concentrating on banishing. We as parents, human beings even, will always be stressing about something! I’ve just got to learn to let it out and deal with things in a more productive way, rather then letting it go to my head… Literally!

Shutting Down

I’ve been pretty silent, I know! Its not like me, not to blog for long periods of time, but these past few weeks have been different! I’ve actually been completely out the loop when it comes to social networking, my tweets have been few and far between and Facebook has been left unvisited.

I’m not to busy, I won’t lie! I’m not on holiday or having some girly time someplace fun. I’m at home, in pyjamas on the sofa mostly.

In my everyday life, my social commitments have suffered too. I’m not spending much time with friends, I’m not even answering my mobile or home phone when somebody calls. Its actually really stupid but I haven’t been able to complete the smallest of tasks. I dread having to do almost anything.

That’s how I knew…. The signs are all there, ones I’ve experienced before making them so apparent this time! Depression… I was depressed and knew I had to do something about it, and do so fast. But that was just it… I was lacking any get up and go which meant that the prospect of visiting a doctor or even booking an appointment to see one was all to much to bare.

Thankfully, I’m starting to feel myself again and though it will take some time to get on top of it all, I’ve started and that’s the hardest bit done.

So, why was she depressed, you may ask? Many assume its the pressures of parenting a child on the autism spectrum but for me that’s a little bit of a cop out. I’ve been parenting little man for almost 13 years. Since the age of 18 its been my life. I’ve since had two more children and being a mother to all three of my children has brought great joy into my life. Yes, when little man is refusing to get up from his bed or even leave the house of a morning I do feel a tad close to breaking point, but guess what? Its not made me depressed… I don’t think it has anyway!

The truth is, life can be a bit full on somedays and when all your problems collide that’s when things go a bit tits up. I can’t put my finger on just one thing and say its this whats caused this depressive period. That’s impossible!

With deadlines looming for reviews and guest post, I just shut off. This blog and that of my other were left at times for days without a post. With my hair thinning at age 31 years and my doctor telling me it was down to stress I just had to let go a little and remember what it was like to be me again.

I love blogging, that much I’m sure off. I just wanted to take a little me time in order to remember that.

So here’s to the continuation of blogging… Here’s to me smiling again.

Oh, and before I drop off, a message for the world! “If you ever feel like your slipping into a black hole of depression then act quickly to nip it in the bud! Many of us are not visiting our GPs, mainly due to the stigma associated with depression! Just remember its an illness and lucky enough its a fixable one too! To be the best we possible can we need to feel our best… Fact!

The Do’s And Don’ts When Parenting A Child With Aspergers Syndrome

Its not easy being a parent to a child on the autism spectrum! Actually… It isn’t that easy being a parent full stop!

Below are some dos and don’t, all based around the stuff I’ve learnt while parenting my little man. Remember, I’m just another parent like you! No, I’m not doctor or child psychologist and what works for us may totally not work for you. But why not have a read anyway… If anything you won’t feel do alone. Please, feel free to add anything within the comments sections:)

mm

So… Here it goes…

Don’t feel guilty if you failed to spot the signs at an early age.

Do remember that this is common for children diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome with many of them not gaining an actual official diagnosis, till their teenage years.

Don’t be to proud to ask for help!

Do fight for it, if those who are meant to provide it, withhold it!

Don’t force your child to be someone they are not!

Do show them you are proud of them for being the person they are.

Don’t assume its easy!

Do remember that parenting any child can at times be challenging.

Don’t feel you have to explain your child’s behaviour, every single time they do something that makes others stop and stare.

But do educate those who are willing to listen! The important issue here is, not to get stressed when out and about. this only makes things more difficult for both yourself and your child. Remember its ignorance and sadly many are guilty of displaying it!

Don’t restrict the activities you do as a family.

Do prepare your child for such occasions with the help of visual resources and schedules to avoid unwanted challenges on the day.

Don’t forget you have a life too.

Do take time out for you, whenever the opportunity arises.

Don’t assume that any two children diagnosed with Aspergers will experience the exact same traits.

But do make yourself aware of such traits, preparing yourself for what may lay ahead.

Don’t assume a diagnosis is your child’s ticket to the support and services they may need.

Do be prepared to battle for them, services! Yes, you’ll be expected to provide evidence showing why it is the help is needed.

Don’t just expect others to instantly understand your child’s diagnosis

Do be prepared for ignorance & denial. Sadly many find that its friends & family who display the worst reactions to the news of a child’s diagnosis. As for strangers…. I not don’t even notice the states as my son displays a screaming match at the local train station. Ok its never easy, but you adjust and get used to it.

Don’t freak out if your child develops an interest in something considered to be strange or unusual.

Do embrace and encourage all that your child loves regardless of its wackiness.

Don’t assume your child will have learning difficulties.

Do celebrate the subjects they excel in, and offer help and support to improve in those they are not.

Don’t base decisions on what you want for your child!

Do base decisions on what is best for them.

Don’t beat yourself up if you lose it! Meltdowns that go on for hours are likely to make you crumble.

Do remember that your human and your child still loves you ( regardless of what they may say).

Don’t be surprised if your child announces to the lady sat on the bus, that she’s old, wrinkled and looks close to death.

Do play games and work on activities designed to help your child avoid social mishaps like that of the above.

Don’t waste money buying your child the top branded toys, especially if they have failed to express any interest.

Do make them happy on Christmas morning if padlocks, staples and rulers were on their Christmas list.

Don’t be too disheartened if your child shows no interest in making friends.

Do have hope that one day that will change!

Don’t force your child to play with other children…

… But do teach them the social skills required to do so! Most children on the autism spectrum will eventually show a desire to interact and play with others.

Don’t waste your time looking for cures

But do look into therapies that have been designed to help your child better develop the skills required to succeed in both child and adulthood.

Don’t assume that just because your child doesn’t display certain traits during childhood they won’t during adulthood.

But Do remember maybes are not certainties.

Don’t try to make your child fit into society!

But do mould them as you would any child so society fits with them.

Don’t use complex language (metaphors and sarcasm) when talking with your child

But do try and teach them that others will to avoid miscommunications.

Don’t force your child to wear certain clothing, eat certain foods or attend certain activities.

Do be sure to research sensory processing disorders as their refusal to do any of the above could be and likely is related.

Don’t assume that your child with Aspergers will have the abilities to cope in a mainstream school (not all can)!

Do make sure you are open minded… Sometimes special schools are all your child needs to succeed within education.

Don’t use your child’s diagnosis as an excuse for unwanted behaviour.

Do remember that all children can be challenging and all are not autistic… You will learn the difference, I have!

Don’t forget to be mum to everyone

Do remember that siblings of children with Asperger’s syndrome may display unwanted behaviour or mimic their siblings traits as a way to gain the attention they crave.

Don’t assume your child will be bullied.

But do look out for the signs as statistics have shown that it is children like yours and mine who become targets.

Don’t force your child to believe in the mystical world of make believe.

Do remember that many child with Asperger’s syndrome like things based upon facts, the type backed up by evidence. If you can’t prove how santa gets round the world in one single night then chances are he will never believe. Just make sure he doesn’t share his findings with his siblings… Like little man has tried.

Don’t ask your child if you look good in a new dress unless you want blatant sharp honesty…

Do be prepared to be shown your love handles and chubby knees if you do.

Don’t believe everything the books tell you.

Do remember that every child has the capability to at least try and lie… Well, at least the desire to try and do so, is usually there! Its just that children with Aspergers are not all that hot at it! Little man usually cracks within minutes.

Don’t be so serious…

Do crack a smile, your child with Aspergers is more than capable of making you proud… Mine does.

Don’t just assume your child will tell you if something is wrong! Aspergers is a communication disorder after all!

Do be ready to put on your investigation cap, as you try to discover just what has upset your child… Remember they will expect you to just know.

Don’t feel that everything has to become a mission in life because of your child’s condition.

Do be prepared to be pleasantly surprised when your child shows you that something you thought would be impossible for them… is actually totally possibly.

Don’t waste time asking yourself “What If?”

Do remember that we have one life, Our own unique and special story. All children deserve to be brought up happy with stacks of love and great memories to support it. Our children will eventually grow up and fly the nest… Yes even those with Aspergers Syndrome! My point? Just enjoy your kids, never taking a single day for granted… Even those not so good ones!

I’m Sorry If My Child Offends You

Being a parent to a child with Aspergers means I’m somewhat used to the reactions of others when my child says something a little off the wall. I’ve found myself having to explain away inappropriate remarks, actions and more in between! Do you know how many times I’ve found myself saying “Sorry” on Little man’s behalf? If you do, please let me know as I’ve honestly lost count.

Well… These days I find myself somewhat reluctant to do so. Why? Its just manners right! Because sometimes its just not necessary anymore.

There are days Little man decides to tell the checkout girl she’s over weight or announce to the entire supermarket that his now going through puberty and I find myself cringing with embarrassment as I feel a thousand eyes fixed upon me. Sometimes I’ll explain that he didn’t mean a comment to intentionally offend, yet some of the responses I’m greeted with are of such an offensive nature in themselves that I then feel any need to apologise instantly melt away.

I don’t find myself constantly announcing that he is on the autism spectrum, especially in his presents as, as his aged I’ve decided that by doing this in his presence could make his condition become something of an issue for him and I don’t want that!

What I do now is try and remind Little man that his chosen words are not appropriate and maybe he should keep them to himself. Little man then has the option to apologise if needed.

As a parent of a child with Aspergers, as time progresses we ourselves go through a series of emotions. Back in the early days I found myself to scared to take him anywhere in fear of incidents occurring. I’m not stating that I still don’t have days when I feel this way but what I am saying is I’m now inclined to take chances! After all we can’t live our life’s hiding away, after all we are a family and we have nothing to be ashamed off.

Yes… You can sometimes find me saying sorry for some inappropriate comment but you won’t ever find me saying sorry for Little mans Aspergers.

We as parents of children who sometimes find it difficult coping with the world they live in, don’t make it our aim to bring up children designed to offend you. We often struggle to find solutions to such outspokenness (not rudeness)! What we don’t need is a dose of judgemental crap from those who haven’t a clue about our life’s.

We don’t all drag up our children… Sometimes there is just more to a situation than actually meets the eye.

Big fat Yawns

Yes, I’m tired… I look like poo and feel like it too. The past few weeks have been anything but leisurable.

I’m laid here on the bed blogging from my mobile, I can’t even be bothered to turn the Mac on as that would require me to sit up and right now that feels like an impossible mission.

So… An update! Little man went back to school last week having been off for an entire week with a sickness bug and a very sore cold sore (when you have Aspergers and a string of sensory sensitivities a cold sore is highly unpleasant) whats more his sleeping pattern became highly erratic which affected us all as a family.

Now I’m used to little man not sleeping to the early hours but something had to give. Little man wasn’t sleeping throughout the night at all and come the beginning of this week there was no signs of this getting any better. Having spent another entire night awake Little man started to settle down and become sleepy at around 6am. I, however had other ideas and decided I couldn’t take another day nor night of it and instead of crawling to my bed like I so wanted too, I instead used what little energy I had left in me, keeping the little man awake.

He wasn’t impressed and bad tempered was an understatement but in order to get him so tired that he’d have no option but to sleep that night I had him feed and dressed ready for school at 8.30am… Despite an entire sleepless night.

Some may say I’m evil and I guess in a way, yes I am! Yet it worked. Ok , he didn’t have the best day at school and my guess is he didn’t feel none to lively, neither, but he got home, ate dinner with half closed eyes and fell crashing into his bed at a somewhat alarmingly early 6 PM… Something I thought I’d surly never see!

Still, this hasn’t erased all his problems when it comes to sleep, he still struggles greatly…. Nonetheless, what it has done is remind him of the pure yucky feeling that comes with a day at school when you haven’t rested your eyes or mind for over 24hrs… And no one actually wants to feel that poo do they?

With this his been more eager to try to sleep at a reasonable hour. Its not been a 100% success story but when one wants to rest their mind it does become that much easier. With this there has been a slight decrease in the nightly antics! These include… Acting out his favourite WWE superstar entrance scene, talking non stop WWE to ones self and that of his constant note jotting on ideas for Mindcraft builds at crazy O’clock! I think maybe his trying to have a catch up, I just wished my body clock would now jolt so I could join him and do the same.

So… Now I’m yawning big fat yawns. Looking at the mess around me (seriously, there’s a fair amount) I think to myself… “Sod It” and instead I’ll bid you all a good night (or should I say good morning)?

Peek A Boo

A beautiful blonde two year old toddled around the house, she giggle excitedly as I removed my hands from my face to shout the words “peek a boo” Her laughter electrifying, my love for her magnified and displayed on my face in the shape of a smile, so big it left little room on my face for anything else.

But then she feel ill and my smile melted, replaced with a thousand tears of heartache… Tears too heavy for a 10 year olds cheek to carry.

Cancer robbed her of many years of childhood, in its place was chemo, Radiotherapy and missed birthdays at home. Her bed not slept in, her duvet untouched. Her home a side room on a children’s ward, that despite the balloons and teddies galore, it wasn’t home… It was just a room for a child to poorly to be home with me, her big sister, playing peek a boo.

Yes… The diagnosis of cancer was nothing but bad, bad luck! It couldn’t be avoided! There was no one to blame!

My mother, devastated, told the doctors they must do all that they can! If that meant medicines that saw her thick beautiful golden locks fade away, then so be it!

If radiotherapy meant she may just have a mild learning disability in the future… Then so be it!

If it meant she may never have children of her own… Then again, so be it!

At least she would still be with us, breathing the air that I breathe! She would still be there to play peek a boo, to hold hands as we grow up! To stand beside me on my wedding day… to drink tea & grow old with me . She is my little sister and there was no questions need answering! She just needed to stay here with me…. And she did!

She did just that, she fraught the cancer that was attacking her little body and even though she was left with a mild learning Disaibilty… Every other possible scenario evaporated, and I mean every one of them!

You see, almost 3 years ago, she gave birth to the daughter we had always suspected she would never have because of the treatment she underwent. Suddenly it felt like god could not be more giving when he gave her the beautiful gift of a daughter, one that she adores.

Finally bad luck had been banished or at least I thought it had… We all did.

That sister of mine who had already been through so much now found herself in the hands of evil, as she became the victim of domestic violence. Love was blind, she struggled to break free because of love, control and power stood in her way.

She was under his spell but eventually broke free for her child’s sake.

Needing help as a new mother and a single one at that, with the council not offering her a home and the prospect of homelessness and possible conflict from her partner she reached out for help in a direction that would only later turn out to be the direction she should have avoided at all cost.

The Social Services!

Only now has her true nightmare bargain… this evil is worse than any cancer! It is one we are powerless to stop it!

From a cry for help to a cry of pain as the Social Services (SS) announce after a year or so of involvement, that they want to take her daughter away… Assess the family as alternative carers if she doesn’t agree, or those carers fail the assessment, an interim order will be shougt and that little girl would be so wrongly snatched away from a loving family home!

Now… I can imagine what you are reading this thinking! SS don’t take kids for nothing. I used to think the same! I honestly never needed to think about it much! I’d read in the paper about targets and bonus, that of forced adoption and secret family courts… But it wasn’t part of my life and I guess my ignorance didn’t want me to think such evil was possible.

I assure you they do take children away from loving parents who have committed no crimes, and this is how…

RISK OF EMOTIONAL ABUSE!

Only now will you understand why I talked about my little sisters cancer! Not because I was crying out for your sympathy vote but because its a huge contributing factor!

Because my sister has a mild learning disability the SS used this to their advantage. She isn’t slow… Hell no, but sometimes she is too compliant for her own good, especially when those doing the pushing are those she thinks she should trust… An authority figure!

Then something happened… something that had my sister flee to them for help and protection but instead she got blackmail. Alone, confused and emotional having just been the victim of abuse! Getting her to agree to conditions on a child protection agreement with that of a signature was like scavenges swarming its prey it was Profoundly immoral and malevolent.

To then set her up in a flat, just so they could monitor her every move while pretending to be there to support her is unthinkable but true. All the time notes were made, notes containing events and points that didn’t even ever happen! With unannounced visits who was there to witness this, who was their to be my sisters witness. With my sister unaware their was even an issue till recently, she failed to tell me…. I only wished I knew these things sooner.

Now they state that my sister, (who I can say with my hand on the bible, is a great mum) May not be able to meet her daughters needs in the future… Because her daughter is advanced at almost 3 years old! They therefore state she may became too cleaver for my sister to parent!

As if it could get any worse… Another reason given for their actions was that of my sisters past abusive relationship which she was sadly the ‘Victim’ off. It seems that falling in love with a scum bag and falling victim to domestic violence now makes you a concern worthy by the SS! Apparently if you have been in this type of relationship the SS can state with confidence that there “Maybe” a risk of emotional abuse in the future! And in the UK “Maybe” and “Future” is good enough!

My sisters cancer and abusive relationship means they won’t be giving her the chance to be her daughters mother, despite this enormous love she has for her that is so powerful only a parent can ever understand it.

She was set up to fail! Parenting class and support were a parenting assessment conducted by those from SS! As a result 60 pages of lies can be found filed under her name.

If she goes to court and she loses, she will be silenced! Her freedom of speech removed by the secret family courts. If she tries to speak she will be jailed! The gag will be forced in her mouth.

How is this still happening in Britain in the year of 2012? How can somebody take a child based on a report of maybes?

How will my little sister who has already been dealt so many heartaches and battles take on one of this scale… She is constantly in tears and cannot eat or sleep… Just how can she fight this.

Her little girl should be beside her, breathing the air she breathes, holding her hand…

My sister should be the one she plays peek a boo with!

This video will open your eyes to a system built on money and targets… One that removes human rights, data protection, freedom of speech and worse children.

Lastly if their is anyone who can help please do contact me please.

An Overflow In Hormones

Sometimes in life we feel we do our best yet our best is never good enough.

Little man is having a real time of it lately. Since his been in his independent special school for children with autism and Aspergers, I have had hardly any calls or emails reporting problems. However, I wish I could say the same for last week.

Little man wasn’t able to go swimming this week so, he helped out at the poolside. I can’t blame his school. They do everything in their power to ensure no child is left behind, and believe me sometimes I’ve found myself surprised that little man hasn’t been sent home for something or another. Last week I think he just pushed them to far.

Thankfully it was taken into account the fact his sleep pattern has been simply hectic. What with us stopping the slow releasing melatonin his been a little sleepless and off the wall.

So… Just what has he been up too you may ask? Well, his been argumentative with staff and actually caused the school bus to stop in its tracks on the way to swimming. Again he was acting a bit of a class clown.

If this wasn’t enough already, little man is also being somewhat inappropriate when it comes to the subject of sex.

He started to ask questions relatively early on. Well, his last year of primary school that is. But now its kinda gone to overload and his constantly wanting to raise the subject. This is fine, completely normal I guess. He is a boy of 12 years old in his first year of secondary school. Nonetheless, little man hasn’t got the required social skills mastered as yet, so, when it comes to dealing with this subject in the most appropriate of ways he struggles. This means he tends to say things that are not really acceptable, he also thought he would announce to the class that he enjoyed watching a bit of naughty TV on his computer when we are all sleeping at night.

Now, when they say children with Asperger’s syndrome do not lie, then please remember… This is absolute pony! Yes, little man is too honest at times, he doesn’t lie very well at all and if directly asked something truth comes before lie. However, he has the natural ability to make stuff up and this was very much the case on this occasion! You may ask how I know? Simple… We have content lock so this isn’t possible. I’ve also been removing the playstation from the bedroom at bedtime. I once woke up to him playing wrestling in the small hours and have removed it ever since.

We have had a long chat about telling stories that have hold no truth. I tried to explain that this type of thing can easily land parents in trouble when children state concerning issues. We are most lucky that his school really understand both his condition and him as a child. If he started making claims like this in mainstream… This would have lead to the AWO to come knocking on our door… No question!

Little man hasn’t been in trouble for this… After all his just a young boy with a sudden overflow in hormones and an over curious mind. I’ve emailed the school about my concerns, mainly that I don’t feel confident when explaining things to him as he seems to either act quite silly or ask questions I just don’t feel I cant answer. With this the school have stated that when they return in the new year, sex education will be a new edition to the timetable.

Somehow I’m guessing (if not hoping a little) that discovering the ins and outs of sex will have him running back to his Lego and computer games in seconds with no further interest for the next 10 years or so… Lol!

Being a kid growing up in this world is scary, but for a child on the spectrum its that bit scarier. Little man is just curious to discover everything the world offers… Including sex.

As for us mothers… Well, it makes us feel older than we actually are… Much, much older. A sudden increase in worry lines are almost certain and I’ve noticed what looks like a train track running along my forehead! Lets just not mention the black eye bags… Seriously, don’t even go there!

Sleep is the enemy

Just when you think you have got it right… Found the perfect solution, the answer to your long awaited prayers.

I don’t know! Maybe if I was given the opportunity to go to bed at 10pm and actually sleep a whole night, I’d fail at the task miserably. You see, once your used to that routine, the one involving very little sleep, you get used to it and get on with it.

We did think things were improving, well, they were! Little man was still sleeping late, but he was sleeping and that alone was fantastic. We changed from the bog standard melatonin for the slow releasing type and boy did we see improvements.

Not only was he going to sleep… Late but not as late as he can do. He was actually remaining that way… A sleep that is! Because this was a slow releasing melatonin it meant no sudden wake ups for the toilet followed by the hours of pretending to be Drew McIntire his favourite wrestler, who keep his mind racing till the small hours.

Like all melatonin, little man became used to it and therefore developed a certain amount of resistance to it. This just meant taking breaks in between. I would just not give him it on the weekends or holidays. Despite this messing up bedtime routines for a day or two, the benefits gained when reintroducing the med was more than beneficial.

But then I started to note side effects, ones that started to, and are continuing to impact on Little man’s ability to receive an education.

The slow releasing melatonin made it extremely hard to get little man out of bed in the mornings. It was as if it was still taking effect. I started to feel like I couldn’t win. Either I struggled to get him up through lack of sleep or now because his meds were to effective. How ironic!

This has resulted in little man missing some school these past few weeks. Its been like trying to wake the dead some mornings… Simply impossible.

When he has been at school, they has been a number of noted concerns from all teachers. It seems that his just not able to concentrate. His either hyperactive (which is normally when he has had no melatonin and overtired) or his almost falling asleep in class and is far from himself. School reported that the Melatonin seems to be continuing to do the good work it does during the night, throughout the day.

With this I lowered the dose following talks with the GP. However, it still seemed to be over effective during the cause of the school day.

I’ve now made the decision to stop it all together. This was the beginning of last week and as a result his just had so little sleep which means so have I! Daddy took the toddler out yesterday as apparently I myself was unresponsive and was therefore left to sleep an entire day. All I remember is waving the children off as they finally went to school… Little man who had only a few hours sleep included. Next thing I was waking up to them returning home at the end of the day. I quite literally sat up from the chair in a confused and somewhat panicky state. Well, it did take me a few moments to remember the toddler was with his father and not off fending for himself.

During my daytime kipping, I had missed a couple of calls from little mans school who wanted to chat about this very issue I’m writing about now. I’m hoping to get back to them today… Or tomorrow If I’m able to remain awake.

Little man had a slightly better night last night. He feel asleep at around 2.30 am, which is actually a ground breaking improvement given his melatonin free. Myself however, no such luck. I laid in bed, eyes open most, if not all of the night. By the time it gets to 2.30am I’m either overtired or just to scared to sleep with the fear I will not wake up.

For now we are weighing up our opinions and will visit the GP again next week. I really don’t want to use any other strong form of medication and am considering requesting to our an appointment at the sleep clinic.

In the meantime, I will also be doing all I can to try and get the little man to burn of excessive energy when he returns from school… Maybe a walk around the woods with my mum and her dog may do the trick. This is something he really used to enjoy but sadly does little off lately.

Well, that’s all… I’m actually nodding off now so better go splash my face with ice cold water ready for the children’s return.