SPECIAL FREE SCHOOLS – ARE THEY WORTH IT?

I recently attended the “New Schools Forum” to gain some information about the setting up of Special Free Schools and to write what I had learnt into a report for the blog “Special Needs Jungle”

Below you can find out just what I learnt from the forum!

Is it worth the hassle (a 100+ page bid and one hell of a load of work) that comes with starting a Special Free School!

Well, there are many factors needing careful consideration as well as a number of different circumstances each need applying to. For example, Is the School already up and running, therefore requiring just “Free School” Status? This could apply to any school (independent & non-maintained) this excludes that of state schools who can instead apply to become Academies.
Maybe you are considering starting up a Special Free School from scratch. It may only exisit on paper or an idea in your head. Maybe its because there is a gap in SEN provision that needs filling, therefore an idea of a Special Free school makes sense.

So, as not to confuse anybody (as we all know these things can be mind boggling) I’ll therefore take this one step at a time and will try to be as clear as possible.

Firstly, What is a Special Free School?

A Special Free School is one that is funded by the Government yet run independently. So, you may ask how these are any different from independent schools? Independent schools are not reliant on the government for funding, instead these schools are funded by a combination of tuition fees, gifts, fundraising or in some cases income investments (for profit organisations). Non-maintained schools are normally ran by Not for profit charities approved by the secretary of state to take children with statements of SEN.

SO, What must a Special Free School Provide & how must it be run?

Provide education for children assessed as needing statements of SEN between the ages of 5-19 years of age.

Provide education to a minimum of 5 children

Only teach children with SEN or those being assessed as having SEN

Have Regard to the SEN Code of practice

Provide a curriculum that is one tailored to an individuals needs

Ran by an acedemy trust (Charitable trust/not for profit)

Admissions to Special Free Schools will continue to be made via the LEA who retain responsibility for assessing a childs SEN

Important factors…

Applications must only be made by those schools that are new (meaning ones not already funded by the state as already mentioned above)!

So… Who can set up a Special Free School?

Well, I should really rephrase the above question to, “Who can apply to set up a Special Free School?” Because the answer is just about anybody can, but this doesn’t mean to say your application will be approved!

This isn’t just a case of knowing that their is a gap in SEN provision (though it helps) groups of parents, charity groups ect… will struggle unless they have a member of their group who has strong knowledge of the education system (basically how to run a school on a senior level)! Head teachers and board of governors make a good starting block. From what I have heard, many parent groups have formed wanting to start Special Free Schools but due to their lack of knowledge on the running of a school (including costs) they have therefore fell at the first hurdle. This isn’t just a case of coming together, forming a group and filling in an application… No, it’s a lot more long winded than that.

Parents/groups/charity groups looking to apply to open Special Free Schools need to do there homework and should realise this isn’t the only option (setting up fully independent schools may be a better, if not slightly easier process). If wanting to apply to set up a Special Free School, groups should appoint a director(s) and as mentioned, preferably someone who has some inside senior knowledge on the running of a school and importantly the likely cost that come with it.

Writing the bid is also a far from easy task, this normally exceeds a 100 pages and no stone should be left unturned! Only then is there a chance you will make it to the “Interview Stage” The Governement has set up the New Schools Network which is there to help groups throughout the process and should really be your first port of call.
Understandably, given the state of the SEN system at present (the fact that there just isn’t enough special schools in most areas and the gaps in provision is huge) many groups, especially those consisting of parents of children diagnosed with SEN, will be looking into Special Free Schools. However, I feel that when looking more closely, they may well discover things are much more complicated then identifying the need for a school, finding a site and opening one! I’m not stating that people assume its easy, just it seems much harder than I first thought, plus it may not be all its cracked up to be (just read on to see where I’m going with this)!

So, what about that of already set up independent schools? Is it beneficial for those groups of applicants? It sounds so considering these will continue to be ran independently yet receive state funding to do so! What’s the catch? Of course like everything there is one!

Firstly I should start by stating that special schools that are already setup and established will not be provided with the “Start up funding” However, it should be noted that there are some exceptions, these being special circumstances such as expanding there pupil capacity but there is still no guarantees.

The next big factor is that of admissions. Once Special Free School status is granted to those independent schools, the LEA will have the right to make them take children with varying needs, ones the school claims not to cater for. Therefore this technically means that independent schools that for example only provide education for children on the autism spectrum, will maybe be made to take children with other needs, social emotional, more complexed SEN or varying disabilities. Actually for me this is a massive issue, one that would make me consider such a change much more carefully if I was making such a decision about an independent school.

My son is in an independent special school just for children with autism and aspergers. Its a school who teach in small groups and have quite high pupil to teacher ratios. I would honestly worry if it was to convert to that of Special Free School status. I’m not being selfish, I just feel that by admitting children outside this status of SEN may result in all children not having their needs met, not mentioning the school becoming over capacitated.
I also slightly worry that dependent on how many independent schools within my postcode convert to Special Free School Status, the local LEA may try to move my child in order to save money (his at an independent out of borough school).

So… with the bad points out of the way, is there any good ones! The only ones I can actually think of is that of the reduction in tribunal cases. It’s quite simple really… Independent special schools convert to Special free school then the number of parents bringing cases to the SEN tribunal will fall. LEA’s will be much more willing to now send a child to the school as it wont be charging the independent fees it once did. This would also mean that more children would possibly be educated within their borough. For me, neither outweigh the issue of admissions (this for me just creates worry).

Whoever you are, if a Special free school is something you are seriously considering their are important issues to consider. One of the biggest is that of the pending Green paper. I ask you, with SEN provision still up in the air, is now the right time to be making such huge decisions? The Green Paper will mean a complete SEN overhaul. This includes the scraping of the SEN Statement with the “Education, Health and social care plan” taking its place. Other factors include everything from the way a child with SEN is assessed, the funding a school will receive and the possibility of a personal budget. We don’t even know what the new education heath and social care plan will even look like and if the social care part will hold any legal and statutory duty whatsoever.

Can’t this government do one thing at a time, it makes no sense to me to open Special Free schools when the way such children are provided for remains so unclear.

OK… So heres the nitty gritty on the issue of Special Free School funding
Now, there is no set capital (not that anybodies letting on) this is therefore allocated on a project for project basis. The secretary of state must take into account the estimated or “potential” costs of each individual groups bid. As already stated there is no start up funding for existing schools, only new schools (special circumstances will be given consideration)!

Do your homework, this is a government funded scheme which will mean that they want to see low costs and good value for money!
Remember, the government is still consulting on long term funding for special schools. As it stands the interim funding arrangements put in place is to receive base funding level funding of 10k per place (note there may be additional funding from some LEAs dependent on an individual’s needs (SEN statement)! Well, lets be honest, 10k isn’t much, especially for a child with complex needs who requires a number of provisions put in place like SALT and OT given on a high level.

Lastly, special free schools like other free schools should receive a bog standard grant to compensate for services that state maintained schools recive from the LA.

If considering a Special Free School, remember these only cater for children aged 5-19. This is regardless of the pending education, health and social care plan which covers children aged 0-25! This therefore gives a clear indication that before the age of 5 and after the age of 19, it may well only be the social care side which applys (here’s hoping that has some type of statutory duty attached or otherwise what’s actually different)?

So, there you have it! I hope I didn’t confuse you!

Thanks to Tania (special needs jungle) for asking me to attend the New Schools Network forum which enabled me to write this report
Please visit the New Schools Network for detailed information and advice on Special Free Schools and Free Schools

Special School – Don’t write it off!

As a parent of a child diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome and special educational needs, I’ve been through the whole tiresome, wearisome battle to obtain a statement of Special educational needs (SEN) that states ALL of my child’s needs, as-well as providing the appropriate resources needed to meet such needs.

I’ve faced the whole mind-boggling experience associated with searching for an appropriate education setting, somewhere with the right resources to cope with what has been described as my child’s “Complex Needs”

I’ve embarked on the deliberating decision, when it comes down to the choice between Mainstream or Special School.

After many battles for, assessments, a statement, an amended statement & the almighty fight to obtain the right school placement, we finally found ourselves here!

Though it was far from easy, Little man now attends an independent day special school, especially for those children on the autism spectrum, catering for children through their primary and secondary education!

There is no words I can use to describe, how having your child’s needs finally met changes life for that of yourself, child and immediate family! When you finally secure that placement, having engaged in many years of consistent fighting for what only seems a child’s most basic right!

Three years ago, you would have likely heard me stating, “Mainstream schooling was the only form of schooling my child would be attending!” Admittedly, like most parents of children with autism or SEN, today, I was ill-informed, completely clueless if you like, to how special school’s actually operated! Well, why would I be any the wiser, I’d never even seen inside the doors of a special school, in all honesty, I guess I kind of collaborated the little I did know (well, what I thought I knew) to that of what I’d been told, the not so great opinions of others! This of course did nothing other than help produce an image within ones mind, resembling something far from accurate!

My opinion was my own, through it was sadly built upon that of ignorance! I’d naively thought that by attending a mainstream school, my child would learn the rules of socially acceptable behaviour, his “typical” peers would somehow be his social skill trainers, without even knowing the importance of their job, they would actively model how society expects one to perform in life.

Surly special schools could only pull my child under, corrupt his delicate evolving mind, somehow lowering his own expectations of what he could possibly do if truly desired! Those around him would swamp him, drowned him in their world, lower functioning children would draw out his more noticeable “autistic traits” he would somehow feed from them, becoming more and more aloof with each passing day.

Would he become more autistic than he possibly was, mimicking the social behaviour of peers? Would this actually lead my child to become a child who required little if no encouragement, staff assuming he was a lost course? Would it just be expected of him to achieve lower marks than he was typically capable of? Would he therefore never be pushed to display his full potential? Then there was the consistency the overly well organised routines, would this make my child more rigid, therefore more demandingly challenging with a total lack of flexibility within the home?

Right then, at that time, the possibilities, even if conceived from ignorance and lack of informed information, made special school not an option! My ill-informed mind was made up!

Nonetheless, 3 years ago, I wouldn’t have been given the option, regardless of whether he needed it or not! You see, this isn’t how it works, though within time, I came to understand this!

It wasn’t at least till 2-years ago,that mainstream school finally admitted that there were indeed problems (and lots of them)! Little man had gone from the active school refuser,the aloof quite child, to one who could not follow the simplest of tasks. He became far more challenging what with sensory triggers and a string of misconceptions. He was no longer able to contain his evolving desire for peer interaction, though he regrettably fell at every hurdle in his quest to achieve it.

Those that did befriend him, did so as to lead him into troubled waters, always getting him to play the clown while laughing uncontrollably when he got into trouble.

Misconceptions and mixed messages lead to constant exclusions, removal of life’s simple pleasures, privileges such as trips and playtimes.He found himself being taught in isolation, removed from what he knew, despite not being able to fully understand it anyway!

When Little man began stating he wanted to be normal, while bashing his head senseless against a wall, choice no longer had a degree of influence within this heartbreaking situation! Basically I needed him out! Unable to let this situation continue, I removed him from the school!

We filed a claim for discrimination on the grounds he was being treated differently as a result of his Aspergers Syndrome as-well as the fact no reasonable adjustments were being made! The school finally held it’s hands up, just days before the tribunal hearing I had been dreading.

By this point in time, an absolute turn around had occurred! The LEA no longer ignorantly refused to carry out a salutatory assessment of little man’s special educational needs! By this point I’d started training, learning the English Education Act, including those very important sections addressing special educational needs. What’s more I’d also obtain a solicitor (it was one thing helping others to get their child’s needs met, yet my own child’s education was in such a state, the solicitor could only but help)! The addition of letters devised by a solicitor did help to move things along, yes, I’m sure of this! Plus thanks to the appointed solicitor, Little man had now undergone independent OT, SALT and EP assessments, all of which greatly differed from those findings given by the LEA. This was all well and good, yet the discovery of the extent of his OT needs and possible additional conditions discovered by his EP, did cause me to draw one or two tears, before jumping back up into fighting mode!

Little man was no longer being home schooled and I’d managed to get the LEA to provide 5 hours a day of 1-2-1 tuition by a tutor at the local library! This was something that continued for almost 8 months!

A statement was finally produced, though it was better suited to a no frills range at the local supermarket. Parts 2 and 3 failed to include little if any real needs or any resources needed to meet such needs. The LEA were now frantically searching for a stat special school, non in which were even willing to meet him (with the exception of one)! I received daily letters through my letterbox from numerous school’s all stating the same, ” Sorry, we feel that we do not have the resources to meet ******** complex needs”

I’d come around to the prospect of a special school, gone were the days of ignorance, I’d now learnt that there were schools for both MLD and SLD as well as specialist schools catering for children with Autism spectrum conditions. I embraced the prospect of a school that had small classroom numbers, teachers who understood my child’s needs, such great things began to excite me. Given the last few years of hell, that mainstream school had brought us, my views had changed more than a little!

I could now be found saying

“My child will never attend a mainstream school again, not over my dead body!”

Now, this remark was not based on ill-informed opinions, underlying ignorance, but one made from experience, and not a good one at that!

With the discovery of Baston House, Independent Special School for those children holding a diagnosis of autism or aspergers syndrome, which was founded by the lovely Anna Kennedy (activist and a mother of two boys on the spectrum) I had to investigate and check the place out!

The school caters for both primary and secondary children, when visiting there was a handful of pupils but just meeting them along with the staff it become very clear that this was the place Little man needed to be!

I wasn’t under the illusion that it was an easy process, after all this was an independent school. However, with the LEA struggling to find a state school by the tribunal date, they gave up, no longer opposing any of my requested amendments.

This meant that not only did they now amend the statement to include all the recommendations of the independent assessors, making this the largest statement I’ve seen, I received some much sought after news.

Of course these amendments included part 4 of the statement! Baston house school was finally named, and I felt something I’d never felt possible, the up most relief and excitement that my child would now spend his school days in his new SPECIAL SCHOOL!

It’s been around 9 or more months now and we are currently approaching his annual review meeting! He will also move up to the secondary department which is within the same school, making this a less stressful transition.

Life now is a lot different! There are less phone calls from upset angry teachers, not one exclusion *madly touches wood* Amazingly little man has also risen 7 (YES, 7) sub levels in reading (in little over a few terms)! Ok, he still doesn’t sleep much and can’t help to have a supermarket meltdown, but his happier, that much, I’m sure off.

So, has special school caused him to regress? No, it’s actually the best decision I’ve ever made for my son, making the hardest and most emotional grating fight of my life, all now seem worth it! Seriously I wouldn’t change a thing!

So, if like me, you rejected the prospect of a special school, then remember this post! Do what you think is right! My advice… follow your heart, it will show you where to go, there is a school for every child, whether it’s mainstream, special or even at home, you’ve just got to find it!

Related articles

• Mainstreaming special needs children; re-looking at the recent New Zealand controversy (autismandoughtisms.wordpress.com)
• Little man’s special school put Orchard toys to the test (aspergersinfo.wordpress.com)
• Mainstream And Special Needs Schools (growingupautistic.wordpress.com)

A great 2011 for A boy with Asperger’s

A boy with Asperger’s 2011

At the beginning of the year I wrote a two-part post covering all the stuff that had happened during 2010 (yes, seriously this took two post and most of it was nothing but bad happenings). So, looking back through 2011 and realising just what an amazing year’s blogging I’ve had, I just had to do it all again.

So here it is, the busiest year on the blog so far, A boy with Asperger’s 2011

January: Not the best month to be honest, we finally get that all important statement of special educational needs for Little man, only toilet paper would have been worth more. Nonetheless we fight to the depths of the earth and it’s amended later in the year and thankfully contains everything he needs thanks to those all important independent assessments & reports.

February: We finally get some good news, which I document in the post, “The end of a chapter” The mainstream school in-which Little man used to attend finally holds up their hands and we get that all important apology in writing, we therefore settle on the Disability discrimination case only weeks before the tribunal hearing. Another great high to February was the invite I received from Cadbury that saw me and a friend attend an excellent Adult only event (no not in that way) we actually tried to set world records doing normal household chores with a twist (making a bed, unravelling toilet rolls and more besides). This was also the month that I got to interview Colin an adult with Asperger’s who had a very interesting message for Mr Cameron.

March: This was a terrible month, the month that saw my eldest Little man (AKA, A boy with Aspergers) get punched in the stomach by a much older youth of eighteen, while playing at the park with a friend and his mother. Little man was just ten at the time and had said “The wrong thing” to a group of older kids, you can read the post “How could that hurt my little boy” for the full story. March was also the month I shared my concerns on the pending Green paper in the post “Aspirations or clever financial alterations”

April: I’m contacted by the lovely Anna Kennedy in regards to her ‘Autism and bullying’ campaign, as a result of this little man appears in an ITV news report which I wrote about in the post “Little man’s television debut” which was perfect timing, what with it being autism awareness month. I also highlight how appearing on the television went to his head a little resulting in him asking everyone and anyone “Do you know who I am”

May: It was this month I wrote one of my favourite post to date “I’m no Vicky Pallord” I also discover that I’m nominated for a Mad blog award shortlisted in two categories, “Most inspiring blog” & “Blogger of the year”

June: Brings with it a fresh start for the Little man when the local LEA crave in before yet another tribunal, agreeing his place at his independent special school for children with autism and aspergers. This was also a really exciting month in the world of blogging, I was featured in two local papers, making front page news in “The Southlondon press” with the Headline “Mum sets blogging standard” & I was also featured in the “Newshopper” both highlighting the news that I had become a finalist in the Mad blog awards 2011. I also got to attend my first ever Cybermummy (blogging conference) and with it the blog received it’s first ever sponsor Londontown.com who paid for me to stay in a beautiful hotel on the night of the conference.

Nonetheless, although the above is all fabulously exciting, June was also a very emotional & overwhelming month, what with Little man adapting to his new routine and little sleep, it resulted in me writing this very open and honest post “falling apart”

July: This was the month I started the Santa’s little helpers feature resulting in me working with some pretty spectacular brands, we were also invited to the multimedia screening of Mr Poppers penguins in London’s , Leicester Square. Alice-Sara brings her friend who are both  excited by the odd celeb spot. In the middle of the month me and the children attend the Pandemonium festival in Northampton to celebrate the release of kung-fo panda 2 as VIP guest of Cadbury. The children get to test the new mini games, Harley becomes obsessed by the panda himself and we eat lunch next to the ambassador of china (Yer, I was praying that Little man didn’t treat the guy and his family to a demonstration of a meltdown, “Asperger’s style”)! Myself and Harley my youngest also attended the Boots bump to Baby event in London’s beautiful Haymarket hotel where Harley took a shine to the lovely Rachel Stevens and the boots clothing range (from the pic below who would think his only 18 months here). July is also the month I treat readers to an up-date on the amazing progress Little man is making at his new school.

August: A busy yet crazy month as I celebrate the publishing of my three page article in the SEN publication (please check it out by clicking HERE if you haven’t already). Myself, youngest Harley, sister and her daughter get invited to the tots event of the year, “The lollibob” where we go VIP and the kids have a blast meeting the likes of Bob the builder, Peppa pig and Ben and Holly from the Little Kingdom.

August was also the month that saw chaos unfold in the devastating London riots. I organised a Lewisham riot cleanup on twitter with the use of the hash tag #lewishamriotclean and from then on everything went a little mad, what with being interviewed for the BBC breakfast show by Gabby in the back of a taxi on the way to Lewisham following a sleepless night due to the sounds of rioters looting the supermarket directly across the road. Then as myself and Little man (yes, he cleaned Lewisham too) stood in Lewisham with a dust pan and brush waiting for fellow locals who I’d rounded up with the help of social media to join us, I’m shocked to discover the BBC are there to greet us. Yes, they interviewed me and followed my progress throughout the day, I later cringed watching myself on the 6pm news, in a report that seemed to go on for ever. My use of the quote “Lewisham is cleaner than usual” following the councils own operation seem to be something of a hit and spread across the papers and internet like wide fire! The images of Little man clearing up outside JD Sports still melt my heart and make me mighty proud.

 

August saw us working with some great brands, Micro Scooter & Meccano to name just a few. Little man also has great fun testing sensory toys this month and I try to raise awareness for child mental health by opening up and writing “Just a Little girl”

September: This is a month that holds some great memories for me, not only did myself and some of the other Mad blog award finalist find ourselves invited to TKMaxx London’s flagship store to choose evening dresses and accessories for the for the Mad blog awards ceremony but I also went on to win ‘Most inspiring blog 2011’ at the awards itself, which was held at the fabulous Talk-Talk experience centre in London’s Soho. Not only did I win, get to meet a host of other fab bloggers but I also experienced a great working relationship with my mad blog awards sponsor ‘OptiBac Probiotics‘.

With all the above going on I really don’t know how I managed to squash in one of my most popular post on the blog to date, “How well do you really know your child’s teacher”

October: was a month that saw the blog working with some pretty big brands such as Sainsburys & Argos, I make two local papers again having been interviewed by the SouthLondon Press and the Newshopper on winning a Mad blog award! Little man takes over the blog, (well, kind of, he finally says how he feels in his first interview, for the blog) where he talks about his Asperger’s, discrimination, bullying, feeling different and acceptance, click Here to read.

November: I’m delighted to become a judge at the BBC Christmas ideal home show for the face of Argos competition which was an amazing experience. I’m invited to lunch by Sainsbury’s at the BBC NEC Winter food show where I also get to watch a live Master chef cook off, I have a great time and meet some awesome people at Liberty’s London when I attend a charity event and I also start working with the wonderful ‘John Crane’ and ‘When I was a kid’ check out the post ‘Joining Forces‘!

It was in November I wrote the post “Merlin’s Magical wand helping children benefit from the magic, well that is unless they have autism” which had 2,000 hits within a few hours and is the busiest post of 2011!

December: The last month of ‘Santa’s Little helpers’ I therefore launch the ‘Santa’s Little helpers, the big christmas countdown’ we feature loads of fantastic competitions with awesome prizes up for grabs. I also get invited onboard P&O ferries to take a trip from Dover to Calais alongside the lovely “Romanian mum where we shop till we drop, and to end such a fabulous year’s blogging, I’m lucky enough to be invited by the fabulous Tots100, to it’s big Christmas party at Butlin’s Bognor Regis where myself, friend and children get to stay in the beautiful Ocean hotel, though Little man finds the change a bit hard to bear.

Wow, there it is, what a year!

There’s been some massive ups and as you can expect one or two downs (what do you expect, this isn’t a fairy tale you know!) But you have to admit, it’s a massive improvement from 2010 that sadly along with 2009 saw much stress and heartache, which just proves, you never know what’s lurking around the corner!

I really do hope that ‘A boy with Asperger’s’ has provide readers with smiles, laughs, entertainment, inspiration, awareness and more!

Merry Christmas and a happy new year to all my amazing loyal readers
We love yer!

What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger!

Image via Wikipedia

Warning, the picture of the loo roll indicates the amount of crap mentioned within this one post! Seriously continue reading and you will see!

So, the return to school is upon us, we hit the high Street for uniform, stock the fridge with packed lunch, try to re-establish the already crap bedtime routine and pray the kids will get up in the mornings.

I’ve never had the privilege of looking forward to the kids returning to the land of learning so that I, ‘Mummy’ can over indulge on cbebbies with little H. I always kinda preferred the holidays over the term times, and never acquired that feeling that many do, “I can’t wait for these kids to return to school in September!” When the Little man was in his old school he was normally excluded within a few hours of returning. My daughter has no problems in school, but then again she isn’t expected just to fit in! That’s right, my daughter doesn’t have Aspergers syndrome which means she is welcomed on school trips and is given a part in the Christmas play. I don’t need to wipe her tears and try to find the answers as to why she isn’t allowed to join in with her peers or why she is being taught in isolation as opposed to in the class-room alongside her peers. Its simple… My daughter has not been discriminated against for being “different” she’s one of the lucky one’s!

Little man wasn’t, he sadly went through all the above and more, that was in-till he moved to a school especially for those with autism and aspergers. He only started the independent special school a month prior to the school holidays, yet in that short space of time, things were amazingly different, so much so, I cannot find the appropriate words to describe this situation any better. Normally by this time of the month dread has started to set in. I find myself becoming depressed with what’s to come, a pool of sick lay deep in  my stomach waiting to be stirred! Yes, I’ve done all that rubbish of trying to remain positive, “LOOK AT ME I’M SO POSITIVE, I MAYBE SMILING LIKE A CHESHIRE CAT ON THE OUTSIDE BUT GOD I’M HOWLING ON THE INSIDE”. When you have been crapped on as many times as we have its pretty hard not to lose all hope.

That’s why it’s strange, I haven’t got that feeling of dread, that deep Pit of sickness in the bottom of my stomach. Don’t get me wrong I’m thankful it’s gone yet I don’t know what to replace it with? “God at times I make so little sense, I struggle to understand myself” Surely I replace it with nothing, isn’t this the overall beauty of it, the beauty of no worries? It’s been so long that I’m totally lost when it comes to being free from such dread, seriously, to many I’m I may even sound as though I’m missing the drama! Well, I’m not, I promise you that! 

It’s not just the removal of the dread surrounding the return to school, it’s all of it, the whole stinking lot of it! You see, you spend so long fighting, it becomes a normality! You don’t see light at the end of the tunnel, it takes over your life… the daily calls to collect your child, the letters you write, appeals and representations you make on their behalf. You give it all you have, wishing for an end, a break from the grilling daily fight, then your hard work pays off! Your child gets into that special school, yet when they do… the massive hit of relieve you waited for doesn’t bowl you over quite like you expected it too. Instead you find that you have gone into some kind of shock, you’re unable to settle and adjust because I guess you’re waiting for someone to take it all away.

I know we are not completely home, safe and dry, (can you every be when your child has special educational need, living amongst a system obsessed with saving money regardless of how its achieved). Yes, anything can happen! Yet this is the same with everything in life, meaning taking each day as it comes, enjoying everyday that don’t bring with it a pile of stinking poop.

Friday, last week I got that bit of paper I’ve worked so dam bloody hard to get. Yes, It has been placed in my hands previous, only to be given straight back with the words, “Stick it where the sun don’t shine” attached to both Little man’s proposed and final statements of Special educational needs.

Gosh, I was fast becoming an expert on the use of fluffy wording that gave the LEA a, “Get out of jail free card” 

Excepting such an insult would make the whole deliberating experience to that point, completely and utterly worthless. 

Believe me, having a statement that states nothing other then good old fashioned common sense, was not the kind of statement that would see my child’s special educational needs met. I had constantly heard that it was my duty as a parent to ensure my child’s attendance at school during the height of Little man’s school refusal! So, wasn’t it my duty as his parent to ensure that when he did get there he was happy, cared for, involved, treated respectful, made to fill his contribution to the school along with his individual opinions were valued?

Such question pushed me to where we are today, where I was last Friday!

It had been pretty quite for some time (I hadn’t heard a peep out of the LEA) Little man may have already gain the place we so furiously fought for, yet his statement still remained a sheet of paper not even worthy as bog roll! For this reason the tribunal was still scheduled for the 26th of September.

It remained in the hands of the Gods (well, at times I’m sure they think they are)! Three independent reports, detailing a wealth of information! These were reports so detailed and lengthily that I myself discovered thinks about my child causing me to both cry and smile. The whole tiresome experience of trying to get your child a statement of SEN sends your head spinning in a total mass of emotions.

I opened the email from my solicitor and read how she had received the copy of a proposed amended statement, that was sent to me (Well, I’m still waiting) However not to freight, with the request for a forward the solicitor sent me a copy via email that I so eagerly downloaded and with bated breathe, I opened the attachment! 

There in black and white was every amendment requested, no corners cut, no compromising! Was the LEA all out of compromises? Were they beginning to have enough of the battle, just as I had done all so long ago? Surely they weren’t providing my little man with the ultimate gift available to them… A package of provision to unsure my sons needs where met, like he so greatly deserved, like you or I?

YES, YES, BLOODY YES…….

I looked over in his direction and let out a yelp, followed by a, “WE DID IT BABY!”

He smiles, high five’s me then sits down to continue his game. He was happy for his mum was happy, however he could not fully understand the extent of relieve that the battle being fought was finally over! He had no clue to what might have been!

And do you know what? That was just the way I liked it!

I never want to fight a fight like this again, yet I know that there will be times I will need to fight my sons corner, whether it relates to his educational or social needs, well, as for the remainder of his childhood anyway! (I’m pretty sure he will be somewhat of a great advocate for himself when his older!)

For now I’ll try my hardest to adjust back into a life of normality (what ever that maybe)! I’ll take each day as it comes, enjoying every school performance that both my children take part in. I’ll roll about in the comfort that he now feels that he belongs .

I’ll channel my desire to help others in that same position, into my work as a voluntary tribunal support adviser, I’ll spend more them on my blog indulging my passion to write and throw myself back into my passion for art!

I’ll discover, learn and watch my new interest in photography evolve 

I wont miss a single moment of my toddlers amazing milestones!

I’ll just try my best to be me again

Only a much improved vision

I can officially confirm

“What doesn’t kill us can only make us stronger!”

Related articles

• Feeling a tad proud (aspergersinfo.wordpress.com)
• Taking the Special out of Special Education (ontarioeducation.wordpress.com)
• Rwanda makes gains in all-inclusive education (guardian.co.uk)

“I’m never going back to school, ever”

Last week I received a call from little man’s tutor requesting that I collect him from the library early (This was an hour before he was due to finish)

Turns out the little dude had a mini meltdown why getting lunch at the supermarket. Reason… He thought the security guard was laughing at him!

Yep, his tutor who I refer to as James for the purpose of this blog, was having a friendly chat with the security guard while little man grabbed a drink from the refrigerator. He called out to his tutor and just at that same moment both the tutor and the guard began to laugh about something totally unrelated to anything Little man was doing. However Little man didn’t know this and as he often does, he jumped in at the deep end.

Of course the guard was unaware of the little mans AS and I don’t think the tutor even had time to warn him. Of course Little man was somewhat confrontational requesting an explanation from the guard and the tutor on what it was they found so amusing. I don’t think he was as polite as he could have been and I’m guessing that the use of inappropriate language may have been used somewhere along the way.

I’m very thankful that his tutor James is somewhat understanding of AS and this isn’t really a massive deal as it is only the second incident in the six weeks they have worked together as opposed to the daily calls I received from his mainstream primary school, regardless it was a situation that needed dealing with.

To cut a long story short I didn’t need to collect him early as first requested as James called me back to say that they were now back in the Library and things were a lot more calmer. Nevertheless he asked if I had a spare half hour when collecting him as some other concerns needed to be discussed.

Sat on the bus I had all sorts going through my mind, “Other concerns, what concerns” this was a constant niggle in my head. I kept thinking what if James no longer wishes to educate Little man. How will little man deal with yet another rejection! I don’t know why I thought this as James is very understanding of Little man’s needs and has told me that he considers him a pleasure to teach. He thinks he has a great mind and personality if given the time to get to know him. Like I’ve already mentioned this is only one of two incidents… So surely not! I think it’s just going to take time for both myself and the little dude to get over the whole mainstream thing and trust people again as I feel little man worries about how things will plan out, where I just feel like we have been failed by the system to many times.

I finally arrived at the library and to my surprise but also delight Little man was clam and relaxed, showing no indication of his not so long ago mini meltdown… He went off and scanned some books while I chatted with James (Oh yes he adores the library’s self scanner)

Well, at last I could finally relax… It turns out James had concerns in relation to the ongoing statementing process and pending transition to a “Special” school that would someday be upon us, as opposed to that of little mans tendency to display challenging behaviour. He stated that every time he even tried to raise the subject of little man starting a new school one day in the further he would become extremely anxious and find a number of ways to not talk about it! This included shouting over James as he spoke, walking off or just shutting down. I explained that I was still trying to contact the caseworker in relation to the final statement, James said we have to come up with a transition plan even without a school place just so little man would always know it was coming.

I defiantly agreed!

The second thing was in relation to his fine motor skills. Yes, he was making zero progress in his writing. He was still refusing to write and near on all his work is done on the computer or is somehow practical… Like science projects and discussions.

His tutor James knew this was one of my many objections to the proposed statement. When first meeting James to discuss what Little man likes and dislikes, what his good at and not so good at in preparation for teaching him, I explained the issue of messy handwriting, fine motor skill problems and the reluctance he displays when it comes to him having to write. I felt that this was an important issue that James needed to know in order to teach him, and this just shows my concerns were valid.

With this I contacted the LEA caseworker who happens to be situated in the very same building as the library. Although I have had dealing with the caseworker a good six months now it was the first time we had met face to face.

I think she was a little worn out after our conversation as Little man would not give her a break when firing hard fast questions at her in relation to the elevator that he saw her come down in. He stated that members of the public should be allowed to use it too and wanted to know the reasons for such a ban! (He just loves an elevator my son)

So the outcome of our little chat was… She requested that I ask Little man’s tutor to write his concerns and for me to forward these on to her as soon as possible as it is going to panel again in order for the LEA to decide if they will make any of my recommended amendments and name my preferred school in part 4 of the statement (Which happens to be independent so I’m not holding my breath) The panel will have the meeting after the half term and the final statement should follow sometime there on after. The Caseworker was in agreement on one thing, and this didn’t require any form of panel meeting! Little man does needs a school… FAST! She had just 15 minutes in his company before she quickly agreed *giggle* He really was talking for England this particular afternoon. With this she agreed to look into my parental preference for an independent school, mainly due to the fact that all the maintained schools have said that they can’t meet his needs (Shock will be had If I’m not required to fight my arse off for it)

Once I had got the Little man home we sat down for a chat, topic being, “SCHOOL TRANSITION” He ran away to his room, on went Bruno Bloody Mars full blast (No offence Bruno) and he remained there in till we left to attend my nieces first birthday party ( Bruno Mars album came too) Once at the party he avoided me big style and with that I decided that the conversation will have to be had another day.

The day after Little man had the day of as the library had closed due to health and safety reasons (angry protest happening outside) So with this I went in for the kill and attempted the school conversation! Again this wasn’t a great success. However this time he didn’t run but instead informed me that his “NEVER EVER, EVER, EVER” going to school again” From now on he will be learning in the library with James Monday to Friday, 9:30 am till 2:30 p.m. and that is final.

I guess that told me!

I will just have to keep trying while praying that when a school placement does come along it’s the one we want or a fantastically understanding one in its place!