Tag Archives: #HAWMC

#HAWMC DAY 19 – An Invitation for five

23 Apr

OK, what if I was to throw a dinner party and as a result I get to invite any five people I like! This can be anybody and they are guaranteed to turn up. Now, how do I know this for sure? Because this “Dinner Party”  is just a fragment of my imagination that provides the inspiration for this post, well, that and them lot over at the wego health blog who continue to provide the daily prompts for the #HAWMC with this one actually being some 4 days late!

So, as this isn’t really actually happening in the real world, you should note that I can therefore invite who the hell I like. Yep, the living and that of the dead are not even exempt from the guest list (however freaky that may be)! The Point… There is no hard rule, I may fancy inviting the Prime Minster… Cough… Yer Right… don’t think so! Maybe my dear granny, best mate or even my childhood crush (though I’m not sure how well he’ll be holding up)! I can even invite the drunk guy who physically beats up the bus stop, “YES BUS STOP” right outside my house on most evenings! Bottom line… You’re all invited to see just how this mum’s imagination works.

Firstly I must tell you what I’d throw together spend hours carefully preparing and cooking (and no this wasn’t in the rules but I’m telling you anyway! Now, please note, this is not my speciality, in-fact I can’t say I’ve ever made such a feast ever before… I’m no Nigella unless you count nugget surprise as posh nosh? Yer, I thought not!

My menu is in fact inspired by none other than Pinterest currently one of my favourite online places to be. The recipes I chose had sold themselves to me through there mouth watering images that I’ve either re-pinned or come across during a blog reading session.

Starter: Tomato Basil Fresh Mozzarella Salad
Pin originally from bellasblog.blogspot.com

Main: Lemon Chicken
Originally from annies-eats.com

Looks yummy doesn’t it?

Dessert: Key Lime Cheesecake Bars
Originally from bhg.com

And let’s not forget what we’re drinking! I chose the very pretty and hopefully tasty drink “The Taste of Summer”
Originally from theregoesthecupcake.com This would defiantly be on the menu.

So, I guess the only thing to sort now is the guest list…

OK… The first would be my Late Grandmother who I referred to as Nanny Peg. My Nan lived with us or rather we lived with her! Not that my mother lived elsewhere, we all lived together. However my mother working full-time and my father not living at home made such an arrangement ideal. Plus I loved it!

My Grandmother was a very down to earth woman, however brought up in London’s Eastend meant she knew how to look after herself and her family. A single mother of two, who worked nearly all off her life (even when she watched us after school she still worked part-time during the mornings). I admired my grandmother for the person she was, very strong-willed, a woman who wasn’t afaird to have an opinion regardless if the opinion  differed from that considered to be the “norm” Open and honest was just one of many characteristics making my grandmother the wonderful person she was! Of course we were close, like you wouldn’t beleive. It was hard when she got sick and by this stage she had moved in with her son, my uncle, as she needed lots of rest! By now I was 17 years old and found I missed her dearly. Nonetheless I found myself spending fast amounts of time with her and although this was something I loved to do, sadly it wasn’t just for social reasons. My grandmothers Kidneys were failing and she was very sick. Dialysis 4x per week which required us to be travelling back and forth into the city to London’s guys hospital. Sometimes I’d come home alone as she’d be kept in for something or another. Other times we’d enjoy doing a detour on the way home, off we would go to chill in a cafe or coffee shop and chat for an hour or more. The above continued for many months in-till my grandmother started home dialysis which required her to set this up herself not 4x a week but 4x a day! It was quite simple, the machine was doing the job her kidneys were failing to and if she didn’t do it she’d die and no one was ready for that, especially me.

I can’t remember which day of the week it was but a week day it must have been as my as my uncle was working and my grandmother had told him that she was going to call me to see if I wanted to visit and have some lunch that afternoon! I never got that call… the only call I got was the one that suddenly changed my world forever, the one that caused me to feel such a indescribable pain, one I’d never experienced before and never wanted to again! With the phone to my ear, I stood looking at those before me going about their day as if in slow motion! Inside my heart was bleeding, outside my body was physically & uncontrollably shaking, my feet rooted to the spot I was stood at! I tried screaming but the words failed to come out… I never got to say good bye, I just wanted to tell her how much I appreciated her, how dearly I loved her.

Quite strangely it wasn’t my grandmothers kidney disease that ended her life but a heart attack instead!

My Nanny Peg would be the first on the guest list! I’d tell her the words I still long to and introduce her to my three beautiful children. I discovered I was pregnant with Little man on the day of her funeral. I still believe he was her gift… my grandmother never did anything by half’s and was the first person to teach me that important lesson that “Normal doesn’t exist we’re all individuals!” My grandmother also once told me that… “Whatever Normal is meant to define, it’s boring anyway! I do hope she’d be proud of her great grandson as well as his 2 siblings! I also hope that she’d be proud of the person I’ve become in the 13 years she so sadly went away. 

My next guest would have to be my very good friend Donna. She’s a massive support to me and we do so much together. Since having the children, there’s not been many friends able to stick around to maintain a friendship. I think Donna likes the fact we’re your “non typical” type of family and to be honest I appreciate that she enjoys the company of her sometimes crazy mate who often struggles to know if she’s coming or going. 

My friend Donna along with my grandmother would actually turn out to be the perfect guests as they are both strong, outspoken characters which really highlights why our friendship is a strong one. Donna does have some of them same amazing characteristics about her, and although she is much to younger than that of   my grandmother, these two ladies would probably get on well.

Now, you may of expected a guest list of sexy men and A listers, you may actually consider my list a tad boring? Truth is I’m a family girl hence why guest 3 would have to be my amazingly wonderful mother. My mother continues to support all that I do and was amazingly supportive both before and after Little mans diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome. My mother is a really relaxed person, she is able create and hold an awesome conversation and is an intelligent women regardless of whether she thinks so or not. I love my family and along with close friends I don’t think I could have dragged my arse through these past few years and remained intact (mentally that is)! A dinner party wouldn’t be incomplete without that of my mother and to see her sat with my Grandmother, the mother she sadly lost, would be an image I’d cherish till the day I died.

OK, Guest 4 … Now this maybe somewhat not what you expected, especially following the announcement of my first three guest, but for me the choice of my next guest is a logical one! Hans Asperger, the man who gives Asperger’s Syndrome it’s name! 

Now, I wouldn’t change Little man, though some difficulties he experiences I’d of course fix in a heart-beat. I love my child the way he is and am no way looking for the so-called “Cure”

I’ve always been extremely interested in psychology, the working of the mind, why we as humans do the things we do! I’ve had to learn all I can about the condition my child has been diagnosed with which has therefore brought about much interest in the subject as a whole. I’d love to ask the man who gave my child the “label” he holds today some questions. What with it being his discovery, I’d love to learn more about his past studies, hear his thoughts and pick his brains. It would be wonderful if he’d be willingly to shed a little light on the grey areas helping me understand autism  just a little more.

Hans Asperger, the medical professor who passed away in 1980 2 years before I’d actually made my appearance in this world, died having little if no idea what type of impact his studies into medical psychological disorders and that of the condition he referred to as “Autistic Psychopathy” (AP) would have on those in the world today. His studies and there findings recorded within over 300 publications were largely ignored during his living years, that was in-till the last year of his life “1980” when suddenly others become interested in his findings and that of the “Autism Spectrum” It was only then that the condition known to us as Aspergers Syndrome, got given its official title after that of its discoverer. Sadly regardless of the rise in those bringing awareness for the condition, it is still sometimes disregarded by many!

Hans has been described to have displayed the very characteristics he described as AS traits. A talented & intelligent man who was described to exhibit the black & white thinking style of someone with AS as well as that of his language and learning skills. Han Aspergers has been noted to have done some great things such as opening a school for those described as having AP and AS. Sadly due to the bombing of the school during the war it was therefore destroyed along with many of the earlier papers he wrote on the autism spectrum during that of the 1930’s and the early 1940’s.

Its documented that Hans Asperger was a kind and caring person who’s passion was to get the children he believed to be on the autism spectrum an efficient & decent education therefore enabling them to approach their adult lives as happy young people with good prospects and an array of opportunities ahead of them.

Sounds like a man who shares many of my interests and defiantly someone worthy a seat at the table.

Oh… I almost forgot, I’m a dinner guest short!
OK, the last dinner guest would have to be… MMM…. let me think… MMM… Oh yes, “Robbie Williams” Why? Because he can provide the entertainment’s and his pretty great to look at too!

#HAWMC DAY 18 – Inspiration

23 Apr

Stories can be used to establish social routines (using ‘fill in the blank’ procedures) and improve the ability to make social judgements. They may also be useful in helping others better to understand the child’s perception and responses.

 Children With Autism & Aspergers Syndrome: A Guide For Practitioners & Carers (By Patricia Howlin)

 The above statement is one made in one of many books I own that covers topics relating to the autism spectrum.“Children With Autism and Aspergers Syndrome – A Guide For Practitioners & Carers” was one of the very first books I acquired on the subject and I will still often refer to it from time to time. So, naturally when day 18 of the #HAWMC was set with the prompt “Pick a random statement from a book and write about it for 15 minutes” this was my first port of call. 

 There are hundreds upon hundreds of statements made within this particular book, so, why this one?

 I feel it’s important to highlight the above to other care givers, especially those with a newly diagnosed child. Yes, this is a life long condition that cannot be cured. Nonetheless, there are things that you can do to help your child develop better social interaction and communication skills, along with important life skills with the use of some commitment and good old-fashioned creativity.

 When my own son was first diagnosed, I didn’t really get sat down and given all the answers, if the truth be told no one really has them to give. Yes, I was sat on a chair amongst an entire room of professionals and all though I was asked that question… you know the one “Do you have any questions” I just didn’t know where to start, I just remember having plenty. I was therefore sent on my way with a folder of bits and pieces and a very jumbled mind. 

 It wasn’t in-till long after the little guy was diagnosed that I attend something called the “Early Bird Plus” designed for both caregivers and teaching professionals caring for or teaching a newly diagnosed child. Now although “Technically” Little man wasn’t exactly newly diagnosed, I still wanted to attend and have some of those unanswered questions answered! 

 It was during this course that I was first introduced to the simple yet effective idea of visual prompts and clues. With this I didn’t only discover ways to formulate routines, making them visible to Little man so he remained aware of what was happening when and where, but they also still play a big part in Little man’s daily bathroom routine enabling him to better do things in sequence (though sensory sensitivities remain a huge factor we are yet to improve)!

 There are many ways to use these visual aids (kinda like the visual symbols used for PECS). They are also very easy to create or if you don’t fancy that they can be found normally on a string of websites and are mainly free to download. 

 I designed and created a great visual aid for use in the bath room and that of the bedroom. Although he reacted in the way I expected when introducing the aids I soon discovered he was using that of the one in his bedroom to help him formulate his bedtime routine! Ok, he remains an extremely poor sleeper, though he does follow the chart removing the symbol cards that I attached to some Velcro dots, placing them in the pocket I attached to the bottom of the chart. He now uses a written reminder he keeps within on of his many organisers. Nonetheless, the bathroom system remains in place and although his very tactile defensive his got the sequence going and is trying much better than before.  It’s my view that any positive improvements within this area really need to be fused over with lots of praise being given to the child.

 So, how else can we use pictures and words as a visual clue and symbol to teach our children the basics in making the right social judgements as-well as good communication and interaction skills to formulate good friendships?

 Some may have heard of social stories which are a great way of getting a child on the spectrum prepared somewhat for an unfamiliar situation such as a trip to the dentist or even a fun day out at a theme park. 

 You can easily make up a pretty effective social story with no more than an exercise book and some pens! However using photos (if available) of the places that you plan to visit and those people you are visiting (of course with their given permission) can really help a child with autism or aspergers feel more prepared with the situation and therefore calmer on the day! Lets face it, who likes visiting the unknown? Those with autism have difficulty regulating their emotions and that of anxiety can trigger a number of undesirable reactions both during the lead up and that of the day. 

 Little man is growing up, his heading up to secondary school (lucky for us this is one that is attached to his current independent special school). People find it difficult to understand that many of Little Mans sudden outburst are caused by anxiety. I think this is not only because Aspergers is known to be the “hidden disability” but more the fact he can come across (at times) rather street wise, especially more so now. The truth is he is improving with the help of his school, his friend next door and some social modelling from others, but his still more than likely to say the wrong thing, something inappropriate, generally considered social unacceptable. But there are times I do wonder maybe they got it wrong then bang… something happens, a meltdown, over intense conversation on his special interest and the inability to shut off. Then there’s his all nighters and inability to switch off. That’s the thing, your child may have problems with social skills but as they grow they can often act a certain way for a chain of different social situations. I’m not stating Little man is socially correct all of the time but his learning. One thing I do try empathise & encourage is for Little man to be himself as he has at times totally moulded himself in a certain way to fit more comfortably into certain social groups and gatherings. He maybe a success but once home he off loads and he will normally have a hell of a lot of bottled up stress need releasing. It’s important that he knows how to behave for an array of situations but to reframe of hide who you are by either going into oneself coming across as a bit shy or maybe even a loner to avoid running into difficulties or act a way because it gets you liked by others, both something  Little man engaged in during mainstream, I can tell you from a parental perspective that this isn’t anything other than a disaster waiting to happen. 

 As many a parent of a child on the autism spectrum can probably vouch, we as parents are presented with that bit more reason to worry when it comes to our children growing up and therefore having to experience new things as they embark on their journey to adulthood. Something like visuals and good social modelling are of the up-most importance and will in time become a natural way of life and acquired parenting skills that we will find ourselves doing with little if any thought at all.

 You know your child and will learn what works best for them and you as a family. As mentioned earlier within this post, Little man no longer uses visual symbols for within his room but now uses words, just as you or I may write our schedule of order of events in a personal diary or organiser , this works and if even he remains awake till 3am with school set to kick of a few hours later, his still able to do those important steps to prepare for bed from brushing his teeth to putting his clothes in the wash. As for preparation for a new situation, we don’t always get things right (those that read about our Butlins holiday at Christmas will more than agree that it didn’t go smoothly) yet at times things go much better than maybe they would have if the effort to prepare Little man wasn’t made. I did the social stories with pictures, but he sees things very black and white so its important to have visual reminders of “Real life” places, people, etc this helps him to formulate some kind of image and expectation. The only danger of this is to be careful not to overdo it as spotted difference or unexpected changes could make the hard work go to pot!

 Lately, I’ve tried to be more creative with how we do the above. I’m agree he knows he sees thinks differently and thinks and processes information a tad different from his age peers. I’m also aware that as his grown his not welcomed anything that causes him to stand out so I’ve tried to continue with the preparation while making it more fun, age appropriate and fun. Last week why searching the App store on my iPhone 4S for some type of daily planer and social story maker, I found Comic Book. As you do, I had great fun playing around with it and trying different things. I created the picture below of my toddler Harley, and sisters new baby Riley. It has a number of stickers with great phrases, themes, colours, fronts and more. After testing it with the toddlers pics, I felt assured that this would be a great fun addition to my social preparation tool kit and Little man agreed it was pretty cool. Maybe with the doctor’s permission  you could snap a few pics during the next appointment and use this for your comic strip! For me, this is an App that will provide more than just good fun. 

 Other ideas are that of video recordings of places you may visit, memory books of the places you have been to before or even use small visual cards, laminated and hole punched and added to a curly key chain key ring and attach to your child’s belt loop. This is perfect for non-verbal children as they can use the symbols as a way to communicate their basic needs such as using the toilet while at school instead of become frustrated or upset. Again all these are easily made and need not cost a fortune.

 I also mention in another of my recent #HAWMC post about the brilliance of Pinterest, I’ve created a great Autism and Sen board that’s packed full of ideas to help your child in the areas discussed and many more… Yes, total pin head here! 

Below are some ideas on creating and using visual aids. These are taken from the autism & Sen board on my Pinterest and original author also included with these pins

from the blog rockabyebutterfly.blogspot.com

from the blog carrotsareorange.com

from the blog etadventures.blogspot.com.au

 Visuals may not seem appropriate right now, you may feel your child doesn’t need them? Remember at some point in our life we all require the use of prompts and instructions as-well as organisation… a work timetable or organiser. When we experience anxiety concerning an upcoming situation or event we form a mental picture which isn’t always easy for a child like mine! Early intervention is the key so if your child could do with a little prompt or preparation, why no give visuals and social stories a try? 

#HAWMC DAY 16 – The brilliance of Pinterest

16 Apr

I have to admit that when reading today’s #HAWMC writing prompt, I smiled a big fat cheesy grin.

The prompt was to create a pinterest board surrounding your health focus and then pin three things and share them here within this post.

There was no need for me to run off and try to open a pinterest account, I already have one and yes… Like many I’m already a bit of a “Pin Head”

Of course, having been actively using and engaging in Pinterest related activities, I had already created such a board (one surrounding my heath focus).

The board is titled, “Autism and Sen” its one of a hand full of boards I have surrounding autism and sen related issues.

This actual board focus a lot around creativity, supplying its followers with ideas that could help make life a tad simpler (visual prompts) as well as lots of ideas for sensory play, ones designed to help your child’s senses develop or give them that sensory seeking pleasure they crave!

Unsurprisingly, I also didn’t feel the need to zoom of and start pinning, the boards adequately filled and continues to grow most days. I did however actually find it quite difficult to decide which three pins I wanted to share, so of course I broke the rules a little and have shared a few more for good measure (sometimes rules are there to be broken)!

My first pin I’d like to share is this awesome visual chore chart which I thought would be a great resource for parents trying to encourage children on the autism spectrum engage in household chores or even as a prop to help teach independence skills. The original content came via the blog moneysavingmom.com.

I love this next pin that links to the blog growingajeweledrose.blogspot.com where some fabulous ideas can be found for sensory fun. This particular image is home-made glowing bath paint. I have tried this and it works 🙂 If your child, like mine is tactile defensive and isn’t to keen on the bath tub, this could be the thing to help.

Staying on the issue of sensory processing and that of tactile defensiveness, this next pin demonstrates a great way to encourage your child to experience and recognise different textures therefore learning to tolerate them. The home-made tactile board below is also great for the sensory seek who just has to seek out different textures. The pin shows a really effect and cheap way to combat such issues (tactile boards that of shop brought are often very expensive products). The pins original content is from the awesome blog makeadoandfriend.blogspot.com.

As mentioned I couldn’t stop at just three, so, here’s a few more…

This pin is from handsonaswegrow.com and demonstrates the beauty in sensory play. Dish or shaving foam is both a cheap and effective play idea for the child who sensory seeks.

Lastly I had to share this pin that displays a badge displaying a quote many of us can relate too…

Pin from hugsnstitches4u.com

You can find my Autism and Sen board along with some other fab boards, over on my Pinterest  just click HEREFollow Me on Pinterest

This is post 16/30  of the Wego Health #HAWMC

#HAWMC DAY 15 – Writing Style

16 Apr

We all have one, our very own unique writing style.

Its something I believe we all acquire regardless of how or where we were educated.

I remember my literacy lessons at school quite well. It was always a subject I loathed and as mentioned before, if you asked me back then if I would every engage in writing as a hobby, literally do it purely because I enjoyed it, you can be sure I’d answered with the term NO WAY!

Regardless of the above, I guess I was never really bad at it (though grammar wasn’t my strongest point and still isn’t). I much preferred art and drama but on the whole secondary school wasn’t one of my favourite of places and I therefore regrettably skipped a reasonable chunk of it.

Now, I’m passionate about writing, its something I engage in daily whether blogging or just scribbling in my diary.

Looking at my writing style I’ve established that I’m quite versatile depending on what I’m writing about, where it’s going, its intended audience (if any) and of course my current mood are all factors that contribute.

Regardless of my love for my Mac Book, I’m a person who still loves to use good old fashion pen and paper. Many of my published post (and many an unpublished post) can be found drafted in one of my many note books.

I feel my best posts are those that have been written on the spur of the moment! This quite often happens at times I feel the need to vent or just declutter my mind a little. Its times such as these I feel I do less thinking more writing! It just seems to flow and when it does it normally results in some pretty good material.

I guess my writing style is one of honesty and emotion with little touches of humour here and there! My personal opinions are stated open and honestly, I let my emotions do the typing, I say how I feel normally leaving little back! Laying it out there for the world to see can be a risky way to write but it works for me!

As for humour, I guess many don’t expect to find it on a blog where a mother writes about parenting a child with Aspergers Syndrome. However, those that parent a child like mine will completely relate to some of the funny situations I sometimes find us in. Other times I find myself adding the odd bit of humour to a potentially  depressing or difficulty situation I’m writing about! This sometimes comes out unintentionally and in many formats. I guess it’s just that common scenario of, “If I don’t laugh I’ll cry!

Will you find any bad language on my blog? Does my writing style consist of profanities? I try to keep it as clean as possible and I don’t write a post full of bad language! However, you may occasionally find the odd swear word has somehow wiggled its way in there! Again this is life and sometimes life can be a tad shit… Oops :0

So, have you ever sat beck and asked yourself what’s you’re writing style?

Post 15/30 as part of the Wego Health #HAWMC

#HAWMC DAY 12 – Stream of Consciousness

13 Apr

Today I looked in the mirror and stared at the reflection before me. I feel myself shudder before turning away quickly as I desperately try to block out the image I’ve just seen staring back at me.

How bloody superficial and yes, I suppose it is! Ok, I may not be back in my size 8 jeans despite my youngest transforming from baby to hyper 2-year-old, but life isn’t just about a jean size is it?

I’m no superficial chick, honestly I’m not. However, I am one who can find herself whirling down that downward spiral into the dark land of no mans land!

Many woman experience the issue of needing to feel comfortable in ones own skin, it’s just that for some… Things go a smudge too far!

I find it hard to write about my past demons when it comes to food. I’m pretty good at expressing my innermost thoughts through my writing especially when writing about my life as a parent and that of Little mans Aspergers Syndrome but this is different, something of a challenge!

Yes, there has been some soul pouring post, I’ve laid myself bear when writing about my almighty battle with OCD, to face it, reframe from fear and I guess… Live with it (that or the prospect it’s never far from sight).

I’ve also told of my journey to combat anxiety and the horror of the recurring panic attack… Unfortunately, these have never left my crowded mind and although I often tend to find myself chest high in the deep of things these often hit me at different periods within my life at least allowing me periods of time panic attack free.

Although I’ve written some pretty soul pouring post whether about discrimination, depression or something else all together my past eating disorder is something I hold back on, it’s not even a subject myself and family often speak about though it did land me in hospital at just 11 which still breaks my heart thinking about.

Regardless of how dispirited I feel when looking at my own reflection I try my best to bury any bad thoughts deep in my mind, I’m a mother of three children, I have my own 9-year-old daughter to set an example to.

So, here I am, trying to do things the right way! No quick fixes, no taking things that bit too far. The truth is no matter what I look like, how many nights I’ve spent awake resulting in huge black bags hanging under my eyes, I’ll never be 100% happy with myself! At my thinnest I continued to have them low days, that’s the problem, it’s a disorder, once you’ve lost them 5lbs you started off wanting to lose you go on to want to lose an additional 5lbs, then another and so on. I now try to see past my reflection! I know I have many good qualities… I’ve just got to love them that little bit more!

Post 12/30 in the wego health callenge #HAWMC

#HAWMC DAY 11 – My Blogs Crazy Theme Tune

11 Apr

So today I was told to imagine my health focus or blog was getting its own theme song, what would it be?

Apparently we all have one, the song that is top of our playlist, the one that makes us smile when we hear it. Or maybe it’s the song that we play when we’re angry or sad.

I thought long and hard about the question and suddenly it dawned on me… My theme tune has to be “Crazy” by Gnarls Barkley.

Yes, it’s one of my all time favourite songs and thinking about it I now know why this is!

You see, I mostly write about my life as a parent of a child on the autism spectrum which at times makes me feel like I’m somewhat crazy. I have also written a number of post about my own battles with mental health, OCD, depression, an eating disorder and that of anxiety (something that plays a huge part in Little Man’s life too).

I often find that the song “Crazy” is being blasted down my ear canal as I type a blog post, I guess I’ve never really stood back and seen just how much I relate to the lyrics and how the song applies to myself and that of my blog!

Here’s the lyrics…

I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind

There was something so pleasant about that place.

Even your emotions had an echo in so much space.

And when your out there without a care,

Yer I was out of touch,

but it wasn’t because I didn’t know enough I just knew to much.

Does that make me crazy?

Does that make me crazy?

Does that make me crazy?

Possibly

And I hope that you are having the time of your life, but think twice, that’s my only advice.

Come on now, who do you, who do you, who do you, who do you think you are,

Ha ha ha bless your soul,

you really think your in control…

Well, I think your crazy

I think your crazy

I think your crazy

Just like me….

My heroes had the heart to lose their lives out on a limb

And all I remember thinking, I want to be like them

Ever since I was little, ever since I was little it looked like fun

And it’s no coincidence I’ve come

And I can die when I’m done

Maybe I’m crazy

Maybe I’m crazy

Maybe I’m crazy

Probably

Uh, uh

Here’s a youtube video of the real thing… Enjoy you crazy readers!

Post 11/30 of the wego health #HAWMC

#HAWMC Day 9 – Stay calm get the hell out of here

10 Apr

He screams abuse in its strongest nature, he hauls it towards you thick and fast. You feel your cheeks burn as they light up an awesome shade of red. You try to reason with him, though he doesn’t listen, just calls you some awful name. Can you believe a child can make you feel such shame and in the most public of places. 

They stare, they stare that almighty stare, it’s as if their eyes are burning a hole right through your soul. 

Rushing along the aisles you hear their sniggers greet you, do they even care, surely their aware you can hear. 

“Please stop” you hiss as you try to gather the shopping from the floor. Your child stares at you blankly before declaring how unfair you are and running in the opposite direction. You set chase, knocking over the contents of the shop as you embark on the mission to catch you’re fleeing child.

Suddenly you stop, fall to the floor, throwing your head back screaming “God, why F***ing me… Why…?” you forget about those stood around you, mouths open wide, heads viciously shaking some may laugh too.

Hands removed from face, your greeted by the store manager who asks “IS EVERYTHING ALRIGHT MADAM” You feel like screaming “Does everything look OK?” Instead you give her a half-smile, Nodding like the Churchill Dog as you scrape your sorry arse from the floor and set about looking for your child, only to discover him right there next to you. 

“Sorry mum, can we go home now”

You feel yourself nodding once more. As you walk towards the door leaving you’re shopping behind you tell yourself…

“KEEP Calm AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!”

Post 9/30 in the #HAWMC set by wego health 

 

#HAWMC Day 8 – A conversation with a boy with Aspergers

9 Apr

“Will you please fetch a glass of water for me please?”

“Mum…. Do you think my name is Edward?”

“Excuse me… Edward?”

“Yes…. Edward!”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh… Mum… I’m being sarcastic!”

“Ok… But I don’t get what you mean!”

“Edward… All butlers are called Edward and I’m not your butler!!”

This is a conversation i had last week with my son who has Aspergers Syndrome. Such conversations can often cause me to chuckle. Little man often sees everything in black & white, metaphors are not always understood so as his aged I’ve tried to teach him a little about sarcasm, with this being the result! Why does he assume all butlers are named Edward? Because two films he has watched recently both had butlers, both called Edward!

This post is 8/30 in the #HAWMC for Wego Health (30 prompts, 30 days, 30 post) this is yesterday’s post (I am still catching up after the madness of the last couple of days, post 9 to follow).

#HAWMC Day 7 – The faces of shame

8 Apr

Pretty & slim I know she was, looking back I now remember! But the mirror didn’t lie, why would it?

No longer able to cope with the disgust that stared back at her she began to run, though not physically but mentally she ran!

Food the root of all evil, yet her only control, it’s predicability she feed from, the shame she hid from!

Trapped in a maze, unable to escape the high walls that surround her, she’s falls at each hurdle.

Tomorrow would be better was something she often told herself! it was her mind, she had control of it, it didn’t control her…. Or so she thought.

Deep down did she understand the dangers as her hair fell all around her, her beautiful white teeth crumbled like chalk as her young innocent body cried out to be feed?

I think that yes she did but somehow it failed to stop her. To far she had come, to now let her efforts go to waste and fail again!

Fighting her own mind, her inner voice won every time. The defeat taken badly… The battle never ending, inside she was dying a little more everyday!

To stop would now be a danger, seriously, it meant the lose of control and for that she’d be punished the worse way how! Her family would suffer, quite possibly die around her, how selfish that would make her!

Counting and checking dominating her young life almost as much as food, combined this lead to a somewhat complex way of life. One consumed with shame all at her own blame!

Laid in a hospital bed the mid-days sun shone through the cracks of the curtain, slightly lightening a darken room. Closing her eyes she failed to escape the faces of shame, fuck, it had all gone so wrong… It wasn’t meant to be this way!

This post is 7/30 in the daily #HAWMC set by Wego Health. The freestyle challenge is to raise awareness of child mental health, eating disorders and OCD.

#HAWMC day 6 – Health Haiku

8 Apr

Firstly I must apologise for the late posting of 2 of my daily #HAWMC challenges. The 6th was my 30th Birthday and I sadly ended up spending a good part of it in children’s A&E due to the toddler hurting his knee (his Ok, though this is another post all together). Then on the 7th I spent most of the day trying to compensate for the things I needed to do on the 6th therefore leading to another missed challenge. It’s day 8 today and I’ve got some catching up to do, so without delay let me tell you about the challenge set for day 6 which wasn’t an easy one, surprising given the little writing it required me to undertake! However, it’s also hard to get your message out there when you’ve been restricted to only a few words or characters.

The prompt was to write a Health Haiku.

A Haiku is a “miniature Japanese poem consisting of 17 syllables – five syllables within the first line, seven in the second and five in the last. No rhyme or meter scheme is employed when writing a haiku. The aim of the haiku is to create a sharp message in little words.

Here below I’ve created three different Haiku’s all inspired by my son’s Aspergers Syndrome.

Emotion feels me
I cannot express how much
Because that is me

Lost in my own world
A much safer place to be
Alone but feel free

Reaching out to you
You don’t see me see at all
Ignored in this world

To discover more blogs taking part visit the Wego Health Blog

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