The Challenges That Come With Independence

So, its been a while since I blogged, all reasons beyond my control.
Well, Little man is officially a teenager now. On the 1st October he turned 13.
As a result his special school felt that he was ready to make a huge step forward into the world of independence.
Instead of of being collected by the school bus every morning he would walk to the train station through the park, take the 20 minute train ride followed by short 5 minute walk to school. Was I hesitant? Of course I was, what mother wouldn’t be? You see, little man had an intense ‘Special’ interest in trains that lasted many years. He was therefore very excited about this big new step he would be taking! Me I was worried sick that firstly we may find him over obsessing about transport once more. It may seem harmless to most but when a child with Aspergers is obsessive nothing else in the world matters.

This however was not my only concern! Little man is a child that struggles to sleep of a night time and if he had experienced one of he’s ‘All Nighters’ then how could I possibly let him ride the train to school? He could fall asleep and spend hours going back and forth to Hayes and Central London… What if he woke up in central london? At least if he was getting collected our morning battle would come to an end once I’d physically removed him from his bed and got him on the transport. But he hated everything about the new transport system, the one he had been placed on this September with little warning of any changes! Little man was used to taking a taxi with two other children and an escort which is provided for by the councils SEN team. This September no more than one day before the return to school he discovers that his escort has gone and will be replaced by another. He also discovers that there is no longer a taxi but a mini bus with a new driver and a heap more kids too. The battles to get him onto the bus were anything but easy! The last week before his independence training started someone from the SEN travel coordination team called me to say that little man was on his last warning! Apparently the new escort couldn’t handle the children, especially little man. I hear a fight broke out between my son and another boy. As a result the escort was pushed (not by little man but another child who as a result had been taken of the bus for good).

So, with this and little man’s pleas I decided that the transport plan drawn up by the school would probably be best at this current time.

To cut a long story short, since little mans been taking the train his had more days off than I care to remember! The first few days were fine. He loved the feeling of independence traveling to school gave him (he still does) however, his sleep pattern has once more gone up the wall and getting him out the door has been a fight that I’m losing. Even when he has left for school his been leaving late. With this and the constant warnings, Little man is on his very last chance and this time its with me!

I’ve made the decision to reintroduce the melatonin despite how its effects make him more drowsy during the school day. What else can I do? It gets to 4 am and I’m seriously at my wits end! Just the other night (well, I say ‘night’ but really mean early morning) I found myself screaming at him… “Why can’t you just go to sleep?” Only for him to look and me and reply “I want to but I can’t… I just cant.” its frustrating… Its frustrating for him, for me… And for the school, especially when they can see his a bright young boy with heaps of potential.

I find myself becoming so angry at life, for we go through these battles, get over them only for them to resurface months later. Its one hell of a rollercoaster, one I have no choice in riding.

Little man doesn’t tend to talk about thinks that may have upset or confused him during the school day, which sadly can lead to all sorts of difficulties, leaving me playing the private eye game. Switching of isn’t easy for most, especially when we have worries and troubles laying heavily on our minds. This for little man, a boy who has difficulties expressing them worries, a boy who already lacks precious sleeping hours, is a struggle on a level most would fail to reach. Its stuff as such as this that makes those morning and night battles that little more difficult than it currently is.

I do sometimes wonder how many other parents there are out there… Going through the same nightly and morning battles that we do. I know there are plenty but at times its a real lonely place.

Sleeping Issues

Having a child with Aspergers can be difficult but having one that hardly sleeps is Incredibly trying.

For this reason little man’s school attendance is suffering and so am I… Big time!

Its one huge battle to get the boy to bed of a night and another to get him up. His like a monster in the mornings, swearing and throwing things about.

As his grown so has the problem. His now as tall as myself so grabbing the covers, carrying him out of bed and then physically dressing him is no longer an option! Well that is unless I want to live! Not only am I going to land myself back in court for little man’s shabby attendance I’m also struggling to get anything done during the day. Shopping is already a nightmare and I’ve given up on taking little man some time ago. This means just a quick trip to the shops has become some type of mission… One I’m not to keen on taking.

With this I have no choice but to visit the doctor and request a prescription of melatonin. Its not fantastic but given his had a good break from it, its effects will be beneficial over the next week or so at least.

So… If all the above wasn’t bad enough Little man is now spending his days bullying his younger brother rather than getting an education. Its not bully as such, its just his need for control and when his not at school or in bed catching up on the sleep his lost his doing exactly that… Trying to control everything everybody does. Its tiresome!

We are now in July and what happens in July? Little man starts preparing for his big day… Aka his birthday. Its three whole months away but that don’t make a difference… Not for the little man it doesn’t!

This year his talking computers… Macs to be precise. Yes, his not asking for anything cheap here and I think I preferred it when he was asking for them strange and wonderful items such as batteries and staple guns! There is one good thing to come out of the obsessive birthday chatter! If he wants something on such a grand scale his going to need to go to bed earlier and attend school everyday! After all he only has a week left till the holidays.

So… There you have it! Sorry its such a mini update but as you may have noticed, I don’t have so much time to get on and blog these days. Here’s hoping the next instalment is a little more upbeat.

Little Man finally Has His Birthday!

Yes, his been driving me mad for months. Anymore birthday talk there was a danger my head would explode. But we got there in the end and god how thankful I am that we finally did.

Yesterday my not so little man turned 12 (god I feel old). He woke up early despite sleeping during the silly hours and was beaming with excitement. He doesn’t like unwrapping so he was given his gifts in a bag and his face lite up with the sight of a Playstation 3.

I also brought him the much awaited (so I’m informed) FIFA 13 which I had to Pre-order at our local supermarket. This along with a few other games, an additional controller and some other accessories made up his birthday list.

I was really surprised that he didn’t kick off when the door knocked and it was time to go to school. But given the fact his favourite teacher had also brought him a game probably explains why.

Once home he had friends over and the roars could be heard coming from his bedroom as they all took it in turns to battle the birthday boy at FIFA or Wrestling.

We then had a special dinner of a fry up (yep, not my idea of special but certainly was the little man’s). We then sang happy birthday before tucking into some delicious birthday cake.

Birthdays in our house are often a little odd when it comes to the little man. He normally requests some pretty odd presents and can normally be found playing with his gifts in the strangest of fashions. Whats more he can often be found doing so alone.

This year the occasion was somewhat more “typical” for the birthday of a 12 year old boy. He invited his cousin and the boy next door over to the house to play. He even encouraged his sister to join in (though this didn’t last, it was a good start).

There was no birthday meltdowns to be seen and I for one was feeling pretty relieved that there wasn’t. On the whole the day was perfect.

We did experience one little problem mind you. The whole excitement of the day didn’t wear him out as I would of hoped it would. The little man went to asleep at an alarming 6am this morning (and before you ask his Playstation was not in play during the course of the night). As a result the little man didn’t go into school today. I tried desperately to keep him awake once it was gone 4 am but I failed miserably.

His now awake and won’t be playing his game till after tea (I don’t want him to associate time off school with having fun). We have therefore had some tears this afternoon, but given I’m writing this in a reasonably silent house, here’s hoping we’re past that.

So, that’s another year and another birthday. Don’t be surprised if in 6 months time, you read that the Little man has been banging on about his 13th birthday. Seriously, this starts happening around May so you’ve been warned!

Awards, Flu, Birthdays And Financial Relief

This weeks been a really mixed bag, one of those up and down weeks.

I’ve been feeling a tad crap and it would seem that something’s going about as the Little man has been off school most of the week. Though its not only him… His entire form group and teacher have also been hit with a bug. OK, its not as extreme as I first make it sound! There are only 3-4 children in little mans class so I guess it’s easy to all come down with a sickness bug at the same time.

This means I’ve pretty much had the little guy under my feet all week and what better opportunity to bang on about your birthday! Seriously, I can’t wait for it to be over! I’m losing hair over this.

Little man hasn’t been dealing with the bug all that well. Having a blocked nose causes all kinds of sensory triggers and his been freaking out about not being able to breath and suffocating inside his own head. Needless to say we’ve gone through a hell of a lot of Vicks this past week.

Having children off school sick isn’t meant to be an easy ride. It Just doesn’t help when you have so much to do. Today is the Mad blog Awards and having had a dress disaster I had to do an emergency shop yesterday! As many know, shopping with a child on the autism spectrum (especially for yourself) is never fun nor easy. So, not wanting to spread his virus to my fellow shoppers and obviously wanting to avoid a meltdown I called his father in for babysitting duties. Thankfully, after what felt like hours I found a dress. I now have my outfit from head to toe sorted and enjoyed last nights stress free evening.

I still can’t believe today is the day for the awards. I’ve had little chance to focus on the event… Hence the reason all my organisation skills have been a little delayed. This time last year (that for the record only feels like yesterday) I was dead excited by this point! In all honesty I haven’t had much chance to get this way this year and I’m only just beginning to feel the waves of excitement run through me.

I’m now really looking forward to tonight’s awards. I’m not staying at the hotel this year which feels a little strange. Myself and the children have a date with London Zoo early tomorrow morning. But what I’m really looking forward to most is meeting up with my fellow bloggers. It’s lovely to meet up with those you talk to almost daily via social media. Getting to see some of the bloggers I met at last years awards and other blogging events throughout the year is really exciting within itself.

Other news this week, Little mans DLA renewal has now been processed which means we shouldn’t have any gaps in the payments he receives. He has again been reward the high rate and its not up for renewal for another 5 years so no more form filling (for now anyway). The fact we don’t have to do any type of battle to get him what his entitled to is a huge relief (I feel that we’ve done enough fighting to last me a lifetime)!

So, that’s about it! A week full of illness, fashion dilemmas, awards and financial relief. Here’s hoping that Little man is fit and well this Monday when he will be celebrating his 12th birthday… At last!

Creations by Charlotte Review

Its Official the party season is amongst us!

However it’s more than Christmas that’s on the way in this house.

Yes, I have just about got over Little man’s Birthday and I have two more on the way. This time it’s Harley who will be two on the 11th December 2011, then just after Christmas its Alice on the 29th January 2012.

Alice normally doesn’t have a party, I never really have the funds following Christmas, so this year I want to at least organise something even if it’s not massive, just a few of her girlie friends.

There are many Online party shops, offering everything from balloons, table decorations to party bags. I have found that many stockist who supply pre-filled party bags charge the earth for this service.

Charlotte is a lovely lady who I met via twitter. Charlotte owns “Creations by Charlotte” and specialises in pre-filled Party bags for all occasions.

If you are a dab hand a filling your own bags and enjoy doing so, that’s fine, Creations by Charlotte also give the option of buying just your fillers. There are many wonderful items available to choose from and I would have loved to receive a party bag of this kind as a child.

I was delighted to check out Charlotte’s site and then review one of her pretty party bags for little ladies.

The bag I was sent was pre-filled meaning it’s one less little thing a busy mum would need to worry about when organising a child’s birthday party. The bag was nicely filled with real girlie treats and was pretty on the eye too. A clear plastic bag with pink hearts, that was finished off with tied sparkly metallic ribbon.

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Contents.

Our bag went by the name LITA

1 mini perfumed pad

1 Princess stationary set (pencil and mini rubbers/stickers)

1 pack of hair accessories (cute heart hair clips)

1 pack of fashion accessories (colourful beaded bracelets)

1 bag of mixed sweets (these were really cool reminding me of the penny mixup from when I was a kid)

The Cost

LITA bag costs £2.70 plus an extra 30p for the sweets, so £3.00 in total

All bags have their own price and range from about £2.30-£3.00 the addition of the sweets cost an extra 30p per bag

What’s fantastic is the fact you can choose from a number of bag designs and finishing touches as well as the type of contents

There are around ten bags in the girls range, each with different themes to choose from, all with their own name & treats.

These would make a really sweet and pretty addition to any girls birthday party, leaving her friends going home smiling. Maybe depending on the numbers, we’ll order some for Alice’s girlie party next year.

Another fantastic product is the baby baskets that are filled with special little gifts, from keepsakes, bonnets, mittens and cute little booties.

These are an extra special gift to give that special someone when congratulating them on the birth of their child.

So, why not check out Creations by Charlotte. You can get bags for boys, girls and even babies.

All products are pretty awesome and make a welcome addition to any occasion.

Delivery was really fast and customer service excellent.

Visit Charlotte’s site by clicking HERE