A message for Mr Cameron

Ok, So I had some problems with my auto publisher yesterday and this is a bit later than planed! However I think you will agree it was worth the wait. Colin explains how life is like for him today and back when he was a child. He tells us about his late diagnosis and the effects its had on his life. He even sends out a message for Mr Cameron, stating a few home truths.

Here’s my interview with Colin… A man with Aspergers

Enjoy.

Claire… Hi Colin, firstly let me thank you for taking part in the interview and also a big thanks for your continued support with the facebook page ABWA by way of the great advice and input you give within the page. So my first question to you is…

Would you be so kind to Describe yourself  in five words?

Colin… Obsessive, Stubborn, Shy, Intelligent, Creative

Claire… It’s my understanding that you were diagnosed as being on the spectrum as an adult… If you don’t mind me asking, how old was you when you were diagnosed and what diagnosis was you given?

Colin… I Was diagnosed at age 44, with Aspergers Syndrome

Claire… Can you tell us a bit about how the diagnosed came about? Did you always know you were somewhat “different” to your peers as a child?

Colin… My diagnosis came about through a councillor I was seeing, through talking to me about my past and how I interact socially. He thought I might have aspergers , so then arranged an appointment for me to be assessed to see wether I was or not. as for knowing if I was different or not, yes I did feel different even though I didn’t know exactly what was wrong, I always put it down to shyness and lack of self-confidence and being a little eccentric.

Claire… Wow I’m guessing that the diagnosis was quite a shock then?

Colin… Yes the diagnosis was a shock, even though it confirmed a lot of behavioural patterns that I had put down to something else…  The meltdowns, obsessions, not being able to talk to people etc.

Claire… Has a diagnosis changed anything for you?

Colin… Well if anything the more I know about my condition the more I feel im not in control. I was told that I would either just get on with my life without a hiccup or it would take over my life. Well, its taken over my life, ive let the diagnosis affect me. if that makes any sense.

Claire… That’s a really interesting statement… Do you think in a way you would have been better off not knowing then?

Colin… In my case I would have to say yes, only from my point of view, others might say I havent really changed at all, that the diagnosis has highlighted that it’s a condition not an attitude

Claire… How did family and friends react to the news?

Colin…  My family don’t know about my diagnosis. I havent been in touch with them for six years. I’ve not many friends at all in fact the ones I do call friends live over a hundred miles away but I haven’t seen them in five years, they don’t know! The friends I have online I’ve only told a select few

Claire…” I’m very sorry I didn’t know that you had not spoken to your family for so long and your friends live so far. I’m pleased you have those few people online to be open with (Me included)”

What would you say to the ignorant people who claim our children on the spectrum will grow out of it?

Colin… I would say that my case proves that you don’t grow out of it, as I’ve been told you either have aspergers from birth or you don’t have it at all, well for 44 yrs I wasnt diagnosed but when I was I certainly hadn’t grown out of it from childhood, it just didn’t suddenly appear it’s always been there I just slipped through the net for many years.

Claire… I mean all children with ASD become adults with ASD and sometimes I think people forget this. What do you feel is lacking within the current system in terms of support for adults on the spectrum?

Colin… There is no or little support from the government for adults, cause its taken as read that the diagnosis will be realised early enough to support them at an early age the support seems more geared towards children than adults, we are left to really fend for ourselves. There is a charity drop in center I can go to, but no 24/7 service. Basically I was given a diagnosis and go.

Claire… “I would have to say that this concern is voiced by every adult on the spectrum that I’ve come to know. It would seem the government just ain’t “getting it” either that or they don’t give a S**t!!!”

If I told you Mr David Cameron reads the blog (u never know lol) what would be your message to him?

Colin… We adults deserve support just as much as anyone else! Sweeping us under the carpet don’t help anyone, everyone talks about inclusion but if it cost money or difficult then you can forget it!

Claire… As an adult with AS can I ask you… Do the meltdowns, anxiety and extremely challenging behaviours improve with age, are you better able to control such  meltdowns now?

Colin… In my case the meltdowns still happen, but are less frequent than they used to be. As for controlling them I’m not sure I can control them… All I can say is that they don’t last as long as they did.

Claire… If you could go back in time and do things differently knowing what you know now what would it be?

Colin…  Not sure to be honest, I would have liked to have finished my degree in mechanical engineering, but let things slip. Not sure if that was down to my aspergers or not.

Claire… ” I would say it’s never to late to finish the things you started Colin”

How was your school life growing up?

Colin… I Was bullied at school, was a quiet and shy child who was quite happy to play on my own as well as with others. My obsession with music was noticeable to me at an early age about 10 years old.

Claire… “Oh my goodness I’m now getting an insight into the mind of my own little Aspie! Little man is 10 totally obsessed with buses and nothing has ever come closed till…… Now that is. He is a fan of Bruno Mars has stored a huge amount of info on the guy and after getting his album two days ago has memorised every song lyric for every track on the album. He can’t sing through and can drive me a bit potty with his singing lol”

So a quick change of subject! What do you think of our current educational system given that ASD is much more known today?

Colin… I Can only go from my own experiences, since I left school in 1979, can only say that the educational system is slow to react to things even when highlighted. Bullying is still rife now so what does that say?

Claire… “No Comment Colin”…. You know what I think!

So… Do you have any “special interest” Passions that take hold of you? Are these long-standing or do they change over time. Is music still a big part of your life?

Colin…  Music has always been a big part of my life, I’ve  been collecting music in various formats since I was 13. I’m obsessed with downloading music, writing poetry. All other obsessions come and go.

Claire… When are you happiest?

Colin…  Plugged into my iPod and writing poetry.

Claire… Do you or did you have Sensory processing problems as a child? Have these changed, improved or just been replaced?

Colin… Noise affects me and always has…  Just different levels or situations are more difficult to deal with than others, people eating, dogs yelping, get woken by the slightest noise so my sleep pattern is bad.

Claire… “I’ve always thought that Little mans father is an undiagnosed aspie and his pet hate is hearing others eat. You crunch he freaks out”

So, they say some people with AS have a high pain threshold! Do u? Little man don’t really get ill or catch bugs that often (unlike his younger sister) but he feels pain “big time” (if there’s blood we are in trouble) so, this don’t apply to us lol.

Colin…  Not sure if I have a higher threshold for pain, but I have a high threshold for dealing with low temperatures, don’t seem to feel the cold as deeply as others do.

Claire… “Yep Little man is the same…. No coat in winter and don’t take it off in summer”

Did you have many friends as a child and do you now?

Colin…  None, that’s my problem I don’t seem to be able to keep friends. People come into my life and then I let them fade away.

Claire… How do you find social situations?

Colin…  Still difficult, even with people I know.

Claire… What subjects did you excel in at school and what ones never made sense?

Colin… Technical Drawing and Maths.

Claire… Interesting… Can I ask is it mental math that your good at? Just that little man is ace at mental math ( better than me) and other parents have reported the same.

Colin…  Yes mental maths… I used to go to the shops at age 5 for my mother and was always able to count and know it was the right change I was getting for the items I was getting. still don’t use a calculator much in daily life.

Claire… It’s said by some that those with AS lack empathy! What do you say?

Colin… Maybe we lack social skills, but we are loving we just don’t know how to express things well, as for myself I express my self better in my poems than actually speaking etc

Claire… What advice would you give to an adult reading this that suspects they are on the spectrum? Is it to late for a diagnosis, is it really needed?

Colin… It really depends on his or her situation, whether it is affecting work and home life never too late for diagnosis.

Claire… What advice would you give to a child/teen that is struggling to come to terms with their diagnosis seeing themselves as someone who is  “abnormal” with very low self-esteem?

Colin… We are normal, we just look at the world in black and white rather than shades of gray, we can be too trusting. but as people we are no different from what is described as normal! We want to be loved, laugh, etc

Claire… “I just showed this to little man and he said thank you… He likes that!”

Colin… Tell little man I said thank you, us Aspies stick together.

Claire… What advice would you give to parents like me raising a child on the spectrum?

Colin… It will be hard, but if you keep giving your love and support as much as you can, the rewards will come, you will see your child grow into adulthood… I’m not saying with less problems but with more understanding and maybe more control.

Claire… Finally, I’m a big fan of your beautiful poems… I’m wondering if you could write one for us to sum up how life on the spectrum is for you. This would be a great ending to our interview.

I am seen but not seen

They see the book cover

Not the story inside

I breath, I bleed, I think

But I am not part of the crowd

My world is black and white

I can not understand

Subtle shades of grey

Warm bloodied

I am still bereft of love

For emotions are hard to fathom

What is easy for most

I find a mountain to climb

Do not pity me or scorn me

Do not hate me or ridicule me

Born from the womb

I am of flesh and blood

I am human too

By Colin Weir

That was fantastic Colin 🙂 Thanks again for giving us all an insight into the mind of a man with Aspergers.

Please feel free to leave your messages for Colin and I will see he gets them. If anyone would like to contact Colin you can friend request him on Facebook. Let me know and I will be sure to pass you the link.

RISK OF PERMANENT EXCLUSION

If you have been reading the blog lately you probably know about little man getting excluded from school.

Well it gets worse If that’s even possible! He was excluded on Wednesday the 3rd March at 1 pm and was back at school on the 5th March. The exclusion was for a fixed period of 1.5 days. Well it was 8.30 am Friday morning and I was getting little man and his sister ready for school. I was getting a little worried that it would be hard for little man to settle back into his school routine but was very keen for him to get right back in there and give it a go. Little man seemed pretty keen to which was a blessing as refusing to attend had been a past problem. Just then my mobile goes It’s the school receptionist. She tells me the Head teacher wants me to bring little man in at 9.20 am as we have to meet and discuss what happens next. Well he goes back to school and gets himself on of those things called an education! surely that’s what’s next. 9.20 am is 25 minutes after the bell and if little man was going in at 9.20 am so was his sister!! We arrived and was greeted by the Head teacher. “Giovanni can you tell me the reasons you were excluded from school ?”  Little man looks at the floor and says ” YOU EXCLUDED ME! YOU SHOULD KNOW! I don’t think it was the answer the head was looking for as he asked the question another couple of times with little man firing the same answer back. “SO WE ARE NOT READY TO ATTEND CLASS THEN GIOVANNI ?” YOU MUST WANT TO WORK IN THE OFFICE WITH ME ?”  Little man shook his head. “Well if you can’t talk to me and give me the reason you think you were excluded maybe it’s best if you do” Hang on! The Head teacher had asked and he answered. You can’t keep taking him out of his class he needs his routine. If there is a problem in class removing him wont help in the long run. They must be able to see this by now. I expressed this and a number of other concerns before waving him off and setting off home.

I was scared to go anywhere. I would normally use this time to go and get the food shopping as it’s hard work with little man, his sister and my baby! But I was worried my mobile would ring and it would be them and I would not be able to get in to collect him right away! Or maybe I would have to leave the shopping and run. My mother who lives around the corner from me and his school would be working I’m sure! In case I gave mum a ring on her mobile in the hope she had finished and was at home. Not only was she still working but she gave me a good talking to. She was angry that I would put of doing day-to-day stuff in case they called. If they called then they would have to wait! I see her point I knew this but I still didn’t want to plan much just in case. 12.30 pm  I notice I have a missed call. Crap are my fears confirmed? I call back just waiting for the bad news. Phew the receptionist told me it was regarding little mans packed lunch It had gone missing from the trolley. This isn’t a first! They had given him a school dinner instead. He was having sausages and ice cream ( Not together I hope ) She tells me he isn’t really eating it but hey his giving it ago. I put down the phone and I remember thinking God how on earth is he coping with all them children making all that noise when using  cutlery! He can not stand the sound of the cutlery scraping on the plate, he says it makes him fuzzy and he freaks out if Alice ever does it at home he will flip out and most of the time this resulted in Alice getting hit.  Well there was no point in worrying so went about my day in the hope he was doing ok. I did my shopping and was pleased that I had done so without a single call 🙂  But once home I heard the dreaded Ring ring ! OH MY GOD! IT’S THEM! This time my heart was in my mouth. Whats happened I shouted down the phone like a mad mother. “Me and the Head have been discussing our options in terms of outreach support for Giovanni. We have contacted Brent knoll autism outreach team. This is a services that will offer… I butted in “I know I know I have read about them and I am also interested in their school so I know their services” “Well Ms Parkinson, this is not a free service and we will be funding it and you need to sign the paper work once it has come in. By the way the call was from Mrs Jeffery’s the schools SENCO! And I like the way they found it important to inform me that it wasn’t free! Cheeky gits!!! However this was fantastic news I was over the moon and felt positive for the first time in ages. I told her in a relieved voice that seeing the school number come up on my phone always made me panic. I have taken two calls from them today and with both heart attacks were in easy reach. She made a little noise that kinda sounded like a quick giggle. She said his had a few minor upsets but all is good. Wow I had less than an hour till home time seems his gonna make the day and I’m sure once Brent knoll are involved things will plan out.

It had been a few hours that the children had been home from school. Giovanni and Alice were sitting eating their tea at 6.15 pm when the phone rings. It’s the school Head teacher wanting a word. I roll my eyes and settle on the sofa in preparation for an ear burning frustrating conversation. And this is exactly what I got!  I’m sorry but Giovanni’s behaviour was so bad today that he may need to be put on a longer if not a permanent exclusion! Lucky I was sitting or I would have likely been falling. How can you go from a 1.5 day exclusion to a permanent one?? At 2pm he was fine a few upsets she said but nothing to worry about. That was a lie!!  The head says he has minor issues in morning but by lunch his out of control. His left the lunch hall a monster. I try to explain his been in that dinner hall trying to cope with his sensory processing  but he goes on to say no it was from lunch till home time. Yer! Point! How does that make a difference ? is this man crazy  don’t he understand anything surrounding ASD. Whats the permanent exclusion all about then? The Head teacher goes on to tell me that at home time he run around the deputy head with his fist together like a boxer and taunted her shouting come on come on you wanna fight, I’ve seen him do it hundreds of times he does it in a playful manner he kinda makes me laugh when his at it because his facial expressions really get me. I’m sure he was doing it in a playful manner. “No it was a threat that I can’t over look”.

He wanted him in on Monday at 9.15am and for me to collect him 15 min before his peers at home time. He would not be joining his class or even seeing them as he was to remain with the SENCO in her office all day apart from a one hour 1 2 1 he would have with a TA. He was even to eat lunch in the office. This was to be an In school exclusion. I checked it out and it can be done. I picked up on a few of their mistakes why dealing with this matter and contacted ACE who are great. Will have to share them mistakes another time as to many eyes around for me. I collected him from school after having been on this type of exclusion for three days  and once out the gate he burst into floods of tears. “I just wanna go to school and run about in the playgrounds I wanna see my teacher and be in class like everyone else.  It broke my heart and with this I promised him no more! If the Head Teacher don’t have Listen then it looks like home will be the safest place to be. I know this is what they want me to do but my main concern is for my childs welfare.

I have since contacted the LEA and told them about the possible permanent exclusion in the hope they assess sooner not later. I have also contacted ACE ( they sent the exclusion ace manual ) Parents in partnership, MP, Educational welfare officer, ISPA, and other autism support groups.

I just hope we sort it before it is too late and I’m home schooling a 9 yr old with a 3 month old baby to look after. Then dropping and collecting Alice from school twice a day. All this until a placement is found. Surly they see that this is best avoided. Yes I want him out of your school! But he needs another school placement to replace the one his leaving. permanent exclusion is not the right way to go about it.

WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT.

What do you do when your 9 yr old Aspie son developes a taste for bad language?

I have to say that I don’t think I have the answer. I’m lost and at my wit’s end. Not only do I feel that I have lost control of the situation I also feel that everyone else is thinking the same thing. I got passed the looks and rude comments pushed apron me from other parents or members of the public. As I wrote in a past post some months ago I’m not going to feel like I have to explain every single thing little man does or action I take to deal with it. Yer I used to do this but I was losing the battle. How can you get the world to see things in a different light. Some people will always be stuck in their ways and little old me can’t do much to change it. It’s just that old fashion way of  thinking. There is no such Thing as autism or in our day it was just called bad behaviour. Yes I want to raise awareness for ASD and hope people do begin to see past bad behaviour in children on the spectrum but there is only so much you can do. The thing is Little mans use of swear words has become so bad Its making me avoid taking him anywhere. I can’t help worrying what others think when they hear his disgusting fool language during an outburst of rage. I tell him off though my tears of shame. My father used to go ballistic if me or my brothers and sister swore. If we ever dared swear at an adult we would be punished to the highest standards but saying that I don’t think it ever happened. We were pretty polite children. I try to stress how important it is not to swear, I tell him it doesn’t sound big, clever or cool. Sadly I just think that now his using certain words without even thinking. A swear word seems to appear in every other sentence and a habit is forming . A very embarrassing habit! As a parent to a child with Asperers I feel that life will alway hand you a problem to try and over come. Once you have mastered it something else comes along. It’s like one long test. But as a friend once told me God will only dish out what he thinks you can handle. Being a parent full stop is a learning game we parents of the ASD child just have a little extra to get through. I guess I’m just finding this one a little harder to overcome.

Techniques I have tried to help stop little mans use of bad language.

• Taking away his belongings.
• No playing  outside with his friend next door.
• No treats.
• Pocket money lost or reduced.

I know that following a punishment though is important with all children. there times I caved but as the behaviour has become worse I have  stood my ground and Little man has hindered his punishment but still with no long-lasting effects. So this is to all you parents out their that have been though it. I need your advice! How do I reduce his swearing and then finally stop it?  All suggestion welcome from parents with or without children on the spectrum.

Something has got to be done. If little man is like this with me and other family members he must be using the same language in the classroom. I already know he is rude to stuff and has problems separating Children and adults so I think that this could be highly likely.

MONDAY FINDS ( WEEK 8 )

There will be just two more weeks of the feature Monday finds. ( Ends on week 10 )

The good news is that there will be a new feature taking it’s place. Will tell you more about this feature in the coming weeks. For now I hope you enjoy this weeks Monday Finds.

AskAnAspie

Run by the organization odds & friends, Ask An Aspie is aimed at parents of children with autism that may have trouble expressing themselves or just have nobody to turn to. By visiting AskAnAspie you can talk to people who have gone through the same experiences as your child and who see the world in the same way. You get to put your concerns to people that know what life is like for a child with Aspergers because they have the condition themselves. http://oddsandfriends.typepad.com

Supernanny.co.uk

Do you love watching Supernanny? I know I do. If you love it as much as I do you will find this Monday find a treat. There is a fantastic Interview on the site called understanding autism one mum’s story. A great Interview with an everyday mum who shares her life and views on bringing up a child with autism. But that’s not all! If you have never visited the site before you need to get a move on. Become a member and enter great competitions, use the supernanny forum or even apply to be on the show ( Um not my thing but maybe yours ) There are links to all the supernanny products and that includes her reward chats. Don’t fear if your not in the UK but enjoyed the USA shows! There is a link provided to take you to Supernanny USA.  http://www.supernanny.co.uk

Aspergers-blog

This is a whole blog that deals with all aspects of Aspergers. A major amount of information to find here. Covering everything from the signs of aspergers, right through to parenting advices on coping and dealing with different aspects of the condition. http://asperger-blog.com

Diary of an Aspies mum.

I will say this is by far my top find of the week. What a fantastic blog written again by a mum. ( Us mums do it well:) ) This mother of an aspie child shares her life’s up and downs, with lots of sources of info and advice on offer. This blog was also designed so well that you can’t help but stay and take a look around. Trust me, go ahead and find out. http://diaryofanaspiesmum.blogspot.com

About. com Autism

A fantastic site offering lots of info, advice and many links. About autism is a great site for looking up info on autism! Why? As there is a good chance you will find it here. Covering a ton of subjects you could sit for hours gripped in this sites fantastic reads. There is also a wonderful forum and a great free newsletter. http://autism.about.com

Thanks again for reading my finds:) I hope you found something that helps you on your journey on the discovery of the autistic spectrum.

MONDAY FINDS ( WEEK 7 )

Oh my what a week’ and it’s only Tuesday. Yes you heard me right! Tuesday! I am indeed posting my Monday finds post a day to late. Please forgive me people for this time I did not forget ( which im pleased to say ) it was more to do with the fact that not only did there not seem to be anoth hours in the day yesterday, it was also that when I returned home yesterday I sat on my bed and that was in deed the very last thing I remember. Sadly it was not the case for big G! little G was sick and kept him up alnight.

Ok so as I have always said better late then never. So here are this weeks Monday find.

Autism London

Providing support for those affected by autism and Aspergers syndrome. They offer a great service with a forum and lots of advice. Check out there site where you will be able to check out some of there activities and events that they hold. You can also check out there fundraising and volunteer page. All this and much more at

http://www.autismlondon.org.uk  Helpline 0845 603 7954

Aspergers support

Aspie community which you can join for free and if you wish you can remain anonymous. Benefits to join are groups, stories, confessions, answers and much, much more.

http://www.experienceproject.com/aspergers

Iautistic

A great find that offers free books, test, games for children on the spectrum, videos and much more.

http://iautistic.com

The national autistic society

Have a look at some of the society’s special events in aid of Nas fundraising events. Your chance to really do your bit and get involved.

http://www,autism.org.uk

The sound of learning

Open house 18th March 2009. Practical solutions to learning difficulties

Sense ability 5th March 2009.

Sensory difficuities associated with autistic spectrum disorder. Dates to be announced.

The sound Learning centre Asperger’s syndrome event. For information on these and upcoming events please visit

http://thesoundlearningcentre.co.uk  Phone +44 (0)208-882-1060

WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT ME MUM?

OMG WHAT A NIGHTMARE!

OK maybe I should be more careful when I say something while little man is about! But come on sometimes he will go right over the top. But that’s just G. Well today we were at the supermarket’ everything was going to plan. For once I felt that my head was working as it should be (before I become a busy mum ). I was remembering everything’ yes without a list! and little man was on good behaviour. Everything was going my way. Shopping complete I make my way over to the check out.

“MUM CAN WE GO TO THE DO IT YOURSELF CHECK OUT?”

“NO G I HAVE TO MUCH SHOPPING FOR THAT. THERE JUST FOR PEOPLE WITH TROLLY’S WE HAVE A BASKET”

For those of you that may not know what the hell I’m on about. The self pay check out means there are no stuff’ you beep it then pay it by putting your cash or card through a machine. But, Big but! When you have a lot of shopping you pay at the check out with the assistant. And yes I sure did have a lot of shopping!

So there I am unpacking the trolley onto the belt. G is helping, he likes to do this. But today his doing it with anger. His not at all happy as his upset at the fact that we are not using the self pay check out. His talking away to himself, well more along the lines of moaning to himself! I ask him whats up but he tells me to shut up! NICE!. The lady at the check over hears and ask him whats wrong. ” My mum is horrible and nasty she never lets us use the self check out”. ” That’s not a nice thing to say about your mum” she says. He looks up and simply says I don’t care. When G acts like this I always think god they must think i dragged him up. G can be rude but he can also be extremely polite. It’s what mood his in but I guess that’s all of us really. Well to an extent. She asked if G was often like this! I jokingly replied yep everyday. Next thing i know his screaming at me and marching of at full speed ( His fast ) Grabbing the bags ( All ten of them ) I sling them into the trolley and do what seems like a supermarket dash as i run after him having not a great deal of luck in catching him up.

“What up mate?”

“U told the lady u put up with it everyday”

“G I was just joking!”

“No mum you were talking about me!”

You see the littlest thing gets to him in away it would not most other children. We phone a cab and sat on the bench to wait for it to arrive. Little man had a face like thunder and sat right on the other end on the very edge of the bench. Any passers-by must have fault I had something catching’ that or I smelt bad! Well at least he wasn’t screaming at me in fact he was doing a wonderful job of not talking to me at all, that was to …………. The cab turned up.

“My mum told the cashier I was bad everyday!” He was blurting on to the driver.

“No that’s not what I meant G!“

“That’s a lie mum I’m not bad everyday and you said you put up with it everyday!” He went on and on and on……

I’m sure the cab driver wanted to laugh but he dared. As we parked up and started to get out the car the cab driver said good luck. I think he knew I needed it, I sure did! G went on about the whole thing for a least another 5 hours. I wanted to whack my own head against a brick wall. God my head was ready to explode. When it did stop I was so grateful so very grateful.

THE WORD PEACE TO A MOTHER’ ANY MOTHER IS A FANTASTIC, STUNNING AND GOD-SENT WORD.

TO A MOTHER OF A CHILD ON THE SPECTRUM IS ONE OF THE ABOVE AND SO MUCH MORE BESIDES.

The Big Interview with Cale Irwin

At last it’s here! The Big Interview.

This month I’m speaking to Cale Irwin a 20 year old with the condition Aspergers. Not only did i enjoy this interview but i learnt a great deal from it’ so thank you Cale.

Hi cale. so you have Aspergers? Is that correct? How old were you when you discovered you had Aspergers? And how old are you know?

I have Asperger’s Syndrome, diagnosed by a psychiatrist in 1997, when i was 8. I was informed about the diagnosis when i started asking about it when I was 17. Since my brother has classic Kanner’s, and autism is genetic, and I know my social skills were awful, it seemed Asperger’s was a possibility. So that’s when i found out about it directly from my parents. im almost 20 now.

Did you ever see yourself as different when growing up? Do you remember what age you were at the time these fellings came about?

I felt different from my peers from the moment I started meeting my peers; the age difference between us was the first factor. Because I was fully conversational at around 14 months, Iwas involved in programs for late toddlers before i’d even learned to walk. By kindergardenthe differences between myself and my peers began to lead to bullying which continued on into my late teens.  However, it was not until 14 that I began to understand just how different I was from my peers. I always knew I was smarter ( not in a cocky way, but in a testable IQ way ), and less socially competent. But  it wasn’t until then that I realized I perceived the world differently then they did. It was then that i become aware of how they perceived me, as an other, and one who had always been an other and simply hadn’t realized it. I would compare it to when the ugly duckling looked up for the first time and realized he wasn’t with his family, but rather with individuals who bore some similarities but also major differences from himself.

Cale what was school life like for a child with Asperger’s?

I obviously can’t speak for all individuals with AS, but for me, all elementary classes besides my gifted-LD class were hell! I was physically assaulted daily from K-4th, and verbally abused from 3rd on. I knew the material before we learned it in class, but teachers became angry when i sat and read rather then paying attention to their lessons. My gifted-LDclass which was all individuals who would later be diagnosed with Asperger’s or PDD-NOS was the major highlight . I was surrounded with kids who were like me. Offered material that challenged me intellectually, and in a classroom built for kids with sensory sensitivities.

Could you tell me is it true that all children with Aspergers develop special interest?

I think most do! Though i know i didn’t develop my special interest ( which happens to be ASDs ) until I was 15 or so. Before that I sort of bounced around, reading a bit of everything, but never finding anything that stuck. Now I eat, sleep and breathe books on autism, and no one can make me shut up about it.

Do you have any sensory sensitivities or problems with moter tics?

I have both! I can’t be suddenly touched or be around loud noise ( classifying loud as at or above normal television volume ). I can’t filter out background noise so i need conversations to be in a quiet environments. I have proprioceptive difficulties, so I stim almost constantly to gain information about the location of my body in space. I also have prosopagnosia ( face -blindness ), but I’m not sure whether that’s classifiable as a sensory issue in the same way.

Recently I have developed a slew of moter tics, and very recently some vocal ones, which would warrant a TS diagnosis in any country but the US (as DSM says 18 or under onset, but ICD-10 says 21 and under). It would be difficult to say whether the TS is more bothersome because of the activities it prevents me from doing ( I’ve had to change my focus in neuroscience as i can no longer operate needles/scalpels ), or because of the unkind and judgemental remarks i get from others.

So Cale, What’s life like for you now, how are you spending your time, are you happy with where your life is heading?

Life for me know is better then it has ever been . I’ve gained a position in the college which allows me to utilize my devotion to and fascination with autism ( my professors were quite excited to find an Aspie with a special interest in ASDs. Now i can do all their grunt work for them, because it’s far more fascinating to me then to them. ; ) I spend about a quarter of my working hours in class and doing hw, a quarter reading informative materials for fun, a quarter reading informative materials for research purposes, and as of late a quarter with autistic children, one of whom I’m setting up an ABA program for. I tend to get the majority of my social interaction with peers during meals or in the half-hour before sleep, but i do try and schedule a few hours each weekend to associate with friends.

I’mvery happy with where life is heading at this point. Academia was made for Aspies and i’ve certainly found my place within it. I have found a job goal to aim for ( BCBA) which I know will be immensely personally satisfying. And adopting children is certainly in my future, either with or without a partner.

Wow they are some pretty amazing goals! I wish you every luck in succeeding  with them. It’s been fantastic speaking with you Cale. Your a person with a strong sense of where his meant to be in life. Your story is one of a young man that never gave up on what he wanted no matter what was but in his path Maybe the years of bullying have made you the strong man you are today. I hope so!

Please come back again some time in the feature with an update on your journey through life, But before you leave would you be so kind to finish by giving us a cool  Aspie fact! one you would like to express to the world?

I can’t think of a cool fact off hand ( other then the speculation that both Steve jobs and Bill Gates are Aspies ), but i will offer my favorite Aspie quote: “For success in science and art, a dash of autism is essential.” – Hans Asperger.

I could not agree more:)

Want to read more on what Cale has been up to? Visit http://frogger11758.wordpress.com or follow frogger11758 on twitter .

IT’S ALMOST HERE

MONDAY FINDS ( WEEK 5 )

BAD, BAD GIRL!

OK now this is Bad! I am really losing the plot this week.  As you can see it’s not Monday! Nope it’s that day called Tuesday the one after Monday. I was laying in bed thinking about stuff as i was yet again unable to get some sleep ( As you can see its close to 5.30am and that’s not because I’m just a early riser) I was working out in my head which finds i was going to add to my Monday finds blog feature today. Then i heard it on the early morning radio show. It’s Tuesday morning OMG!

Not being funny but that means that i spent the whole of MONDAY thinking it was SUNDAY. When i think about it it’s kinda crazy as no one said nothing and i remember telling my close friend on the telephone how much more I’m beginning to enjoy Sundays. I even wished her good bye saying i had to check the roast in the oven lol. My my I’m only 26 reaching 27 years old’ anyone would think i was older then 60!  Anyway now that i have finished explaining my early on set into a mad person I will get back to my Monday finds AKA Tuesday. Whats a day late? I’m just glad it wasn’t a week touch wood.

British mummy bloggers

Yet again i have found what seems to be a great ning social network. I must add it’s UK only just in case you missed the word British. The site is not a site based around ASD but it sure has a good deal of parents that discuses the subject due to there children being on the Autistic spectrum.

You can join British Mommy bloggers by visiting http://britishmummybloggers.ning.com   

Contact a family

UK based charity that are spread over most of the UK. There offering free help, advice and support for those that have children that are disabled. Contact a family are also known to to have many events and sibling groups. Find out more by visiting http://www.cafeamily.org.uk    

Autism myths. 

Worth a visit this one. Some people could find a lot of comfort within this blog as half of what people say is some what untrue. This site exposes the many myths of Autism. Visit http://autism-myths.org

Autism Hub

Am i the last to hear about this one as its a very busy list come social network. Get your URL listed in the great big long list of autism sites. You can also subscribe to the RSS as it is listed beside the site name. Handy  really not having to click o sites opening a load of windows. Take a look http://www.autism-hub.co.uk

 

MOTHER TO SHERK AND THE FACES OF AUTISM….

Best to last! but kind of a cheat ( it is two sites i chose but its by the same publisher)  http://motherofshrek.blogspot.com  and http://casdok-facesofautism.blogspot.com  Written by a single mother to a son in which has Autism and is none verbal. His names C and his 20 years old. His mother has written some fab post on Mother of shrek and her idea to create a site that displays some top art work and lovely images of lots of children each suffering from some kind of ASD. These two blogs are wonderful. Im coming back.
IF YOU FIND THESE LINKS NOT TO WORK PLEASE FIND THEM IN MY SIDEBAR LISTED UNDER MONDAY FINDS. THANKS.

CHECK THESE BEAUTIES OUT!

Oh yes i have been a lazy lady!!

It was so about time i started adding some more links and site reviews to my links page! It wasn’t like i didn’t have the resources’ more so the time:(

Never mind as i have kicked my own butt which i admit was much needed’ and added some newbie reviews:)

Wanna check out what I’ve been checking out? Want to see what sites and blogs i felt the need to write about? Check out the review page listed at the top of my screen and have a look for yourself!

GO ON’ GO ON. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO:)