I stood heart in my mouth, I no longer could find the words needed to comfort him, I couldn’t make this pain go away.
I tried to be strong, really I did! But it was hard, it was incredibly hard to see him this way yet again.
As he sobbed, catching his breath through his endless stream of tears he tried to speak “Mum, please beg them to take me… please”
He would normally explode in a fit of anger, haul himself into a wall smacking his head as he screamed and used endless obscenities as he raged. Not this time, it was like he had no energy, no fight left in his body… He was broken.
“What use will it do” I asked him…
“I knew he would do this, I knew it” he sobbed as he lay in a heap on the hallway floor.
I turned away so that he wouldn’t see my own tears for I needed to be strong, strong for my child.
Two hours later my son was still laid out on the floor, red faced with bulging sore eyes. He wasn’t having a tantrum, he just laid silently as if in a deep trance.
My child had been told he wasn’t allowed on a school trip, he would be excluded on that day instead! Do you think his reaction was a bit extreme?
My son had been uninvited from many school trips, coincidently excluded whenever one was planned. I was in no doubt that this was just because my son has Aspergers Syndrome.
This was however a trip he had looked forward to! One they had continuously used as a reinforcement tool for gaining desired behaviour. They excluded him for two days, except one of these days feel on an inset day meaning it would consequently role over onto the next day, the day of the trip! What had he been excluded for? Something so small I can’t even remember!
It wasn’t just the missing out that hurt my child, it was every single act of rejection he was submitted to, each one breaking down his self confidence a little more.
So, why am I writing this now… Of course I mentioned it before, back when it happened, his now in a special school and enjoys many trips. However, this is not the case for every child and when I hear of another child being continuously subjected to the same treatment, it breaks my heart a little more!
The UK is fall of children stuck in pupil referral units, treated like a criminal when many just have SEN and have been failed by the system. Others are out of school because no one is willing to take them (especially when they see that exclusion record with your child’s name on it) this was the case for my child for around 6 months.
In my opinion the laws surrounding exclusion are slack. Why is it that children are excluded on trip days, given a double dose of punishment. Surly regulations should be made much tighter!
If you have a child subjected to this type of treatment then it’s time to speak up. Your not alone and if we all come together we have a much stronger chance at getting heard.