4 Mar

So I’m having a pretty good day, till the school contact me.

The rude receptionist at the other end of the phone informed me that little man was being kept in the head masters office and he needed me to come and collect him right away. What the hell, Here we go again. I had only just returned from the school five minutes before as I had to collect some papers from the office and sign a form for little man to see an outreach working that dealt with Aspergers and behavioral problems. She was due in now why couldn’t she do something to help ? After all it’s her job. I was starting to feel like a yo-yo my poor 11 week old son needed his feed yet I’m off out again. Lucky for me I was staying with family due to ongoing plastering works at home so at least I could count on mum.

I marched into that school with steam flying out my ears. I didn’t even look at the receptionist as she was walking a thin line with me. My main concern was for my son and me giving her what for really would not help. She could wait ! Just then I see the head who is walking towards me shaking his head. Yer can u belive it I wanted to shake some sense in to the man but some people are a losing battle and getting this man to understand was kinda like getting a one year old to do math. Lets not forget this guy tried telling me little man had no problems at school just at home! yer right I think he needs to eat his own hat.

The head starts by thanking me for returning to the school and leads me to the office the one that I’m seeing a little to often for my liking.

“I really tried but his just gone to far today” Tried I don’t see anyone trying!  He goes on to tell me that little man has sworn at him and the deputy head. He then was asked to come to the office but instead run of through the school kitchen and along the corridor. No one could catch him and all the time he was running he was shouting abuse at the staff. He said it had to stop. He needs to follow instructions and isn’t! Because of this he thinks its best if he is excluded from the school for the remainder of the day and tomorrow. I’m going to court on the 30th March as the school believe his attendance was poor from June 09 to Nov 09. When ever he refused to go I phoned the school requesting help only to be told it’s my own problem. Then at a meeting I’m told that just because he is diagnosed as having Aspergers does not mean it’s a reason to not attend school. The thing was it wasn’t the reason his sleeping problems brought on by having Aspergers was then the problem and In my mind if a parent needs help you offer it! You don’t make them attend court. Now here I stand and you are excluding my child the very same child you said was an angel in school when you blamed my parenting for his behavior at home. The same child you state should be in school everyday as Aspergers is not a reason for none school attendance. Wow how things have changed! I had a solicitors appointment  at 4pm and now I would not be able to attend. God I’m seeing a solicitor for the school having me up in court but I’m unable to make appointments with him as the head and reception staff are always calling me in.

“Miss Parkinson you need to understand I have no choice If Giovanni did not have special needs this would have happened a long time ago” What the hell you trying to justify this. You people denied having received his formal diagnosis but it was sent to six different professionals within the school, a meeting was held with his DR and the school SENGO. Some how I find this hard to belive and to be honest as a school a diagnosis on paper should not of mattered you should have recognized he had special educational needs. As some of you may know I have sent my request to the LEA for an assessment of needs with the schools full support. Now we understand why the sudden turn around occurred. You just want him out! You give up!

The head lets little man into the office and explains whats going to happen. He just looks at me and make no eye contact with the head then turns and tells him his made a big mistake just you wait and see! With this I looked at the head with a smile and said ” Do you see ? My son is a clever child because he speaks the truth! You may not yet see it but yes this is a massive mistake on your part. I turn around and me and little man headed for the door. Just as I’m about to leave the head shouts OH ONE MORE THING. EXCLUDING HIM EVERYDAY AT LUNCHTIMES IS  LOOKING VERY LIKELY RIGHT NOW. I bite mt lip and just nod and walk away. If they really think I’m going to pick him up each and every lunchtime then they are thicker then i fault. I have contacted educational welfare, parents in partnership, the governing body, and the LEA. I also plan on contacting my local MP.

When speaking with little man later on that evening I discover that it all started when he stuck up for his little sister when she fell out with another child. He was trying to be there for his sister.


  1. Ira Harnan March 5, 2010 at 8:15 am #

    I like the layout of your blog and I’m going to do the same thing for mine. Do you have any tips? Please PM ME on yahoo @ AmandaLovesYou702

  2. Gavin Bollard March 4, 2010 at 10:16 pm #

    Ouch, I feel for your issues. In some ways, it’s good that the school sank their own arguments because now you’ll have a quick court case.

    Of course the real question is; what are their plans for addressing the behaviour? It’s obvious that “excluding” him isn’t going to help.

    They a to implement proper – and POSITIVE behaviour management programme.

  3. Rachel March 4, 2010 at 8:17 pm #

    God, you must be going insane…..this school sound like they don’t understand your son and they don’t care. One last thing for you to try is the charity ACE-ed ..google them because they gave me help regarding the schools matter when I had to move from a rubbish school…..keep strong 🙂


  4. Jazzygal March 4, 2010 at 6:43 pm #

    Hi there! I am just now connecting you personally on fb, your fb page and your blog! Bit slow on the uptake am I!

    I am seeing the connection that the school is making too. You are taken to court because you refused to send your child to school on occasion …. then when you do they exclude him???!! Makes sooo much sense doesn’t it!

    I’ve caught up briefly on your last couple of posts and it’s just awful how you, your son and ultimately your whole family are being treated. It always shocks and saddens me to read stories like yours about the schools (in Ireland, UK and US etc;etc) that just don’t get the support that our children need. And because of that they will never EVER get to see how successful the results can be when schools LISTEN to the parents, READ the reports and IMPLEMENT appropriate supports.

    My little man..WiiBoy aged 10 is such a success story. we have the absolute support of the school and it annoys me when other schools don’t support the child and their family. I’ve blogged extensively about our journey through Mainstream school and the current fight to retain our Special Needs Assistants…here in Ireland these posts are being scandalously withdrawn from some children.

    We too experienced behavioural issues during the transition. WiiBoy behaved inappropriately, attacked other kids and told teacher to “shut up” for example. He was never, ever excluded. Yes, there had to be repercussions but I always fought for the punishment to be delivered along with teaching him how to behave appropriately (through Social stories etc). It took 4 years for him to learn coping strategies like “Walk Away” and “Tell an Adult” when “things are hard for me”. This worked only because it was taught in school (by SNA and teacher) AND at home.

    I wish you the best of luck with your fight and I’m delighted you sent in that application for a Statement. I’m also glad that the school ( well, someone in the school) recently realised your child needed the help. These facts have to look good in any court case, don’t they???
    Do you by any chance keep a school/home communication diary to record all these events ??? I’m a great advocate of diaries 😉

    Good luck! xx Jazzy.

  5. Shivon March 4, 2010 at 6:13 pm #

    I am so sorry that you are having such an awful time! It seems that no matter the country the schools are always trying to pass the buck. I will keep you in my prayers

  6. mummys little angel March 4, 2010 at 5:12 pm #

    Please also contact The Human Rights Commission and consider deregistering him from school and home educating him.

    Also contact The National Autistic Society and definitely your MP.

    Your son is a school refuser, that’s one of your defence lines. He is ASD and not receiving any suitable assistance at the school, nor is it forth coming.

    See your GP about your sons stress levels and explain it’s the school that’s doing it. Ask them to write a sick note for your son so you BOTH can have time to sit and consider your next move without having to worrying about the head throwing his toys out of the pram again


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